"Guess Who's Back? Back Again."

Hello Friends!! I kinda feel like an absentee parent - so sorry for being MIA. Things have been completely insane - work & personally! But I feel like I may be able to get back on track now!

How was everyone's Mem Day?! Mine was atrocious! Well - it did get better - sorry that was a lil dramatic. Basically I never made it to see my nephew - which to me = epic disaster. I got to the airport at 3 pm (for my 5 pm flight) and things started going down hill from there. Our flight was 2 and a half hours delayed - they claimed for "mechanical problems". They wouldn't let us leave the gate area and I was completely starving - but figured as soon as I got to where I was going - I'd eat. Then we finally all boarded the flight and the captain gets on and says (in a pilot-y voice):

Pilot: Ok so we're just about ready to push off. Quick thing - we have no air conditioning today - so it's gonna be a lil hot. But as soon as we get in the air - it will cool down dramatically. So just relax - enjoy and we'll be to your destination in 49 minutes.

Soo let me also note that it was about 100 degrees in NYC that day - and I was in the last possible seat - right by the bathroom. Amazing. But fine - I'd be to my precious lil guy in no time! We push off start out and we're waiting and we're waiting. THREE HOURS LATER…

Pilot: Ok guys so listen up, we're still about 18th in line to take off and now we're out of fuel. So real quick we're just gonna scoot on back to the gate and fuel up. We'll de-plane and have you guys back on board in 20 minutes to take off.

Ok so by this point - I'm hot, I'm tired, I'm cranky - it's almost 11 pm. Let me paint you this picture - it was so hot that the guy diagonal from me came on in a full suit - at this point he was only wearing his suit pants and shoes - no shirt at all. I had on a sweater and pants - hair all down - at the this time - no sweater, a gross camisole that shouldn't be seen in public, my hair in a side ponytail and my makeup dripping down my face. As we're heading back to the gate the pilot claims there's "traffic" and it has now been about a half hour. Things started to get RULL ugly - I'm talking Snakes on a Plane - ugly. People are yelling and screaming. The flight attendant is yelling at us - no one can go to the bathroom - no cell phones - no water - we're hot and angry and then the pilot gets on.

Pilot: THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE. THE YELLING NEEDS TO STOP. DO NOT DISRESPECT MY FLIGHT ATTENTANT. THIS IS RIDICULOUS. IF IT DOESN'T STOP YOU WILL BE ESCORTED OFF BY AIRPORT SECRUTIY.
Man in front of me: AT LEAST WE'D GET OFF THIS F'ING PLANE THEN!!

I mean it was serious. They finally get us back to the gate, deplane us and we're all waiting in the gate. There is no one else there, nothing is open, we're still starving. Finally after about 20 minutes they announce that our flight has been cancelled. OH I'M SORRY WHAT?!?!? After all this - we are cancelled?!

HATE!! I was almost too angry to even be angry. After about 15 minutes of phone negotiations, I left the airport, shared a cab home with 2 random guys and went back to my apt. cried for a bit, ate some random food I had and went to bed. Mem Day '11 - huge bust!

So on Saturday I immediately texted Hazel, Chase & Juan to see what they were up to. Collectively they were able to pull be out of my bad mood and salvage what was left of a beautiful weekend. So I thank them all for that!!

Anywho - these past few days have just been cray cray - but I'm back on track and ready to rock & roll! And btw - I saw Hangover 2 last night - basically peed my pants. It was hilar. I think I also wasn't expecting it to be good - so that made it that much better. Recommend you all go see it this weekend!! XOXO

Mem Weekend '11

Sooo glad this week has come to an end! This will be short and sweet!! Enjoy the weekend, the weather, the beach (I wish), the BBQ's, etc!! Anything and everything that Memorial Day Weekend has to offer!! I'm off to see my favorite little boy in the world (aka my nephew)!! XOXO

Good Morning!!

Three quick things about my day so far. It's only 10 am and it's already interesting.

1. Confession. I left my house this morning in such a whirlwind. Do you ever have those days? I had plenty of time and then all of a sudden I was late. I was running around like an idiot and trying to through an outfit together - which I don't even think looks good - but meh - it's Thursday. I finally depart my apartment - lock the door - elevator - good morning to my doorman - start my trek. I'm about 5 blocks in when I realize that in my haste I forgot a majorly important thing. Like very major. I forgot to BRUSH MY TEETH!!!

WTF is wrong with me?! And the weirdest thing is that literally the other day while walking to work I thought to myself "wouldn't it be weird if you forgot to brush your teeth?!" - just little inner-monologues I have with myself. And it happened!! I was so mortified. I pretty much figured that everyone on the street knew of my poor hygiene. I never forget to do that - its just obviously part of my routine! So I ran myself into the next CVS I saw and grabbed those new disposable toothbrushes and about 4 other things I realized I needed. Got into my office without speaking to anyone and quickly whipped them out. They actually work fairly well. I mean - if you're in a pinch! I wouldn't use them as my regular toothbrush - but I now have 4 "extras" in my desk - just in case!

2. Piano Man. As I was mortifyingly walking to work this morning I saw something else that made me less embarrassed about myself. There was a man walking towards me in a suit with his head phones on (ummm totally dating myself - I should have said "iPod on") and he was full out playing the air piano.

Basically practicing his skills while walking. I'm all for "2 birds 1 stone" - but seriously - in the middle of the sidewalk you need to play your piano?! And I'm not talking just "pretending" to play - he was full on "playing" certain keys, pedal, etc. The best part is that no one really even flinched. You gotta love New York!

3. Blue Man Group. Also while on my crusade to the office - I passed another man in an interesting get-up. He was fully decked out - feeling his best - thinking he was the shiz - in an electric blue/cobalt suit.

Who wears that?! I mean I know I prob shouldn't be judging on people's attire - those in glass houses and all - but where do you work where that would be an appropriate outfit for the "office"?! And where does one even find such a thing?! It literally blinded me! So bright - and it was too early for something so bright to be in my face.

Hopefully this day will get a little less weird. I mean maybe I got all the "weirdness" out first thing - instead of being spread out through my day! I'm just glad it's Thursday - one more day and then a THREE DAY WEEKEND!!! Yee-ha! (Ummm I'm a little embarrassed about that - but not enough to delete it - sorry I'm not sorry.)

Headboard From Hell

I thought last night would be a nice relaxing night of putting together my new headboard and watching Glee. Well that's what I did - but relaxing it was NOT!

My sister is staying with me a few nights a week because she just started a fab internship in the big city. We had a great dinner followed of course by Pinkberry and headed home for the night. I had gotten my new headboard from West Elm delivered during the day - another aggravation - but I digress - so I was so excited to slap that sucker on! Here's the pic of what it should look like:

So I unpacked it and whipped out my instructions. They keep the instructions on their website to try to "go green" - so I printed them out and was ready to go. looked simple enough! We'd have this thing up in no time. WRONG. One slight thing - the instructions mentioned 2 pieces that didn't come with the headboard. So I made a lil call and after many transfers and my face getting increasingly redder from anger - I was informed that the instructions that are on the website - the only ones they give you - are not in fact accurate. I didn't need those pieces. So I asked simply:

Me: Ok - can you just send me or email me the correct instructions then?
West Elm: Yes - not a problem
Me: Ok - I'll just wait a few minutes until they come through my email.
West Elm: Oh - no it's going to take at least 24 hours. I have to put in a request for the directions - we don’t just have them.

Oh, I’m sorry…what?! You don't have the real directions on hand - yet you don’t include them with the delivery - and the ones online are wrong. So not only do I have to call you to ask about it - but then I have to wait AT LEAST 24 hours before you can so kindly email them to me?! So basically I lost it. My sister was laughing - I was screaming - it was a scene. Something I thought would be so easy turned into insanity.

By that point it was time for Glee. I calmed myself down. Thinking we could do this tomorrow night, I'd still have my sister there to help me. But by the time Glee was over - I was raring to go. Determined to get this thing on my damn bed. My sister and I are two intelligent women - we could figure this out!

A few flat washers, sweating, cursing and bolts later - we stuck that thing up. Will it stay - I don’t know. Will I hear a crash in the middle of the night and have my head suddenly against the wall - possibly. But it's up…for now!

Lunch Lady

Happy Monday - bleh! I had a fabulous weekend - got to babysit one of my favorite little boys! It was so fun. One of my best friends from college came into the city this past Saturday with her little family. We all went to the Central Park Zoo for the morning. Saturday was gorg! And then I got to babysit so her and her husband could go to an engagement party. We had so much fun! Went for a walk, played on my yoga mat (little things), had dinner …it was great! Then yesterday was so gross and disgusting - I only emerged from my lair once to go to the grocery store. Then I promptly ran back home to dive onto my couch. Which is where I remained for the entirety of the day. My allergies were off this hizzle - so it was just what I needed!

So here's the sadness of the day - my lunch is already over. As I've mentioned before, I do enjoy food. And because of that my work days are usually cut in half by the excitement that is lunch time. I have my breakfast at work (Greek yogurt & strawberries) and then around noon I'm allowed to have lunch. This means that my day is half way through! But today it's sad because I finished my lunch by like 12:15 pm and now - here we are. I still have more than 4 hours left! This is not an enjoyable way to deal with the hell that is Monday!

However - I will share with you my new favorite lunch treat! I try to be good about bringing my lunch. Living/working in NYC can get expensive and when you realize you're dropping about $15/ day on lunch - that's $75 a week - it kinda makes my stomach hurt (not enough to not eat lunch though, obviously). So - my solution is to try my best to bring something at least a few days a week. A lot of times its leftovers. At my old job it was great - I'd just basically bring my fridge and we'd concoct our lunches in the kitchen and it was great. Here - not so much. Bringing your lunch is a rarity and I feel very self-conscious when I'm in the kitchen "preparing". So I try to keep the prep to a minimum here! You can imagine my excitement when I found these:

Amy's Pocket Sandwiches. Now I'm a fan of Amy's products - so I was happy to try these new little situations. Seriously - they are amazing. So good - and because it's Amy's - not bad for you at all! I've had the Cheese Pizza, the Spinach Feta & the Spinach Pizza. I'm going to try the Broccoli & Cheese this week! The best part is - they're super easy to transport and heat up! It's a perfect solution! The only down side - I eat them quickly and then they're gone!

So for all you "lunch packers" run (don't walk) to your nearest grocery store and pick some of these up! I promise - they won't disappoint. Oh and they do fill you up. I normally eat an apple as an "afternoon snack" and this totally ties me over until then! Happy lunching!

You Can't Say Bomb In A Bar

Sooo last night was interesting to say the least. I went out with Chase & Hazel and as per usual, things got weird. I love this city - but there are some strange people here and I happen to encounter all of them!!

We started the night at Rattle N Hum. We had never been, so we thought we'd give it a try. It was great - great selection of beers on tap - fun atmosphere - the food was pretty good. The only problem - it was about 145 degrees in there. Like so unbearably hot. I was, of course, sweating - but so were Hazel & Chase. And this poor man across the room looked like he just jumped in a pool. He was drenched - in his business clothes - drenched. So sad. After we finished up dinner, we had to leave. It was just wayyy too hot. We headed over to Galway Hooker. I had my birthday party at the West Village location, but I've never been to the East Side one. It was fun. Not too crowded - good music. We were having a good time. Hazel wasn't feeling that well - so she called it an early night. Chase and I decided to stay for one more drink and see how we felt. This is when things took a turn.

We were sitting at the bar - minding our own business - chatting away when this random guy approached Chase. He had slicked back hair and was wearing a leather jacket and tight jeans - need I say more?! He creepily went up behind her and asked her if he could leave his book bag with her while he went outside to smoke. She was kinda taken aback - not sure what was going on - next thing - book bag on the ground in between our 2 bar stools. He leaves. We both immediately start freaking out - certain there is a bomb in the bag. I'm watching his every more outside. Chase said, "if he leaves - we're outa here". Of course I agreed. He came a few minutes later and was all smiles and wanting to chat. Neither of us were really feeling it, but of course it was a ridiculous convo.

Chase:  We thought you had a bomb in that bag.  (nervous giggles)
Guy:  Haha - oh yah there's a bomb in here - a bomb in the bag (creepy trailing off laughter)
Me:  Prob shouldn't say "bomb" in a bar.
Awkward silence
Guy: So what do you girls do?
Chase: We're lawyers.
Guy: Do you like it?
Me: Some days I do - some days I don't.
Chase: What do you do? (and then looks at me and says "besides make bombs")
Guy: I'm a chef. I only do private parties - I don’t like catering to so much. (Umm last time I checked they were the same thing).
Me & Chase: Cool.
Guy: Where do you live?
Chase: Brooklyn (and no neither of us lives in Brooklyn nor do we know anything about Brooklyn)
Guy: Oh crazy - me too! Where abouts?
Me: Dumbo (the only place I know)
Guy: Me too! DO you know the Golden Apartments (or whatever he said)?
Me: OH yah - totally - that's a great area.
Guy: Oh let me go get my friend to join us - be right back (leaves his bag - again)
Chase looks at me: We HAVE to get out of here - that's totally a bomb.

So we left - actually we ran a little bit. And then we stumbled upon the best bar EVER. It's called The Wharf. It was fabulous. The only part I didn't like was when Chase & I were in the bathroom and this girl was POUNDING on the door yelling about how she was sick blah blah blah. So we opened the door to find this little thing - all drunk. So gross. We then went to sit at the bar - turned around and she was making out with some dude. I looked at Chase and said "oh looks like someone is feeling better". Hein. We had a great time there and we even met another interesting person. He was very loud and thought he was pretty cool. He was chatting us up about how awesome he was and how he was there alone. All this ridiculousness that I didn't care to listen to. Chase then wanted to go to this other bar downtown, so of course this clown decides he's coming with us. We go to get into the cab and who slides in, too, but the guy that girl (the one from the bathroom) was sucking face with!! Of course Chase took advantage and decides to make fun of him:

Chase: Dude you were totally making out with a sick girl who was so drunk.
Dude: No I wasn't.
Chase: Yes you were - so gross.
Dude: I'm engaged - that wasn't me. (Later the other guy told us he really wasn't engaged he just wanted us to stop making fun of him - I still don't buy it.)
Chase: It was totally you and that makes you even more of a jerk.

So the cab ride was awkward. We get there and the big spender was all "oh I got this" - the cab was $5. We get inside and I coined it the "Land of Little People". Everyone was about 21 years old. All right out of college - ridiculous. The girls were all tiny and skinny and throwing themselves at guys - all drunk.

It was insane. Even though Chase proclaimed "I'm not threatened by these whores" - we were a little out of our element. The band was good though and maybe on another night I might have been more into it. But I just wasn't feeling it. So we called it a night!

I got home - chatted with the doorman - totally normal. I literally walked into my apt and fell into bed. This morning - woke up - couldn't breath - can't really talk - allergies OOC!!! But I mean it's FRIDAY - so it's all good! Enjoy your weekends you crazy kids!

I Have A Love/Hate With Summer

Guys seriously - we are entering into two of the top reasons why I don't like summer. Even though I LOVE summer, there are a few things I take issue to. The first is actually getting there - my allergies are like off the charts and the second - sweating - obviously.

So this morning I did NOT wake up feeling like P. Diddy. I was a disaster! Sneezing - my eyes were itchy - my throat felt like it was closing up. Just disgusting.

These changing seasons really do a number on me. And this year in particular seems like the worst ever - amirite?! Is anyone else having major issues this year?! I mean every year I prob say "this is the worst" - but seriously - I think this might in fact be - THE WORST. I've also had a migraine for like 3 straight days - totally not helping matters!


Ok onto my second issue - sweating. By now you should all know that I have a sweating problem. It's insane. I don’t smell - I just sweat. It's embarrassing and awful all rolled into one. Like yesterday after my spin class - I got back to my office - drenched. Like it wouldn't stop. I had to close my door for an hour and hope that I "came to" and eventually it stopped. Ridiculous. The worst part though is that I walk to work - which I love. But by the time I actually get here on these humid, hot days - I'm drenched.

I wish there were showers at work - because I'd just assume take one here. It's really quite disgusting. I'm at the point where I don’t even dry my hair - became not only does it add extra heat - but it's pretty much wet by the time I get here anyways - so what's really the point?! The air drying is better for your hair anyway, and it helps to "keep me cool" on my walk.


It reminds me of this one fateful day when I was en route to work in DC. I was getting the Metro and it was about 800 degrees down there. I was also sweating before I even left my apartment - walked out into basically a "soup like" atmosphere - so by the time I climbed down the 7 miles worth of steps to get to the Metro - I was done for. Usually I carry a tissue/napkin at all time in case of situations like this. I try to "blot" the sweat away and look somewhat like a normal person. But I went to go get one out of my bag - shear panic - there was nothing. I was rifling and found NOTHING! Not even piece of paper I could use. Of course this made me panic more which in turn made me sweat more. I realized what I had to do. And as embarrassing as it was - you know the whole desperate times - desperate measures. I had to resort to using a panty liner. Yes folks - a panty liner that I had in my "make up bag" for emergencies - along with 5 other tampons.

I had no choice. So I pulled it out discreetly - hoping that no one saw me and began to "blot". And wouldn't ya know - it was the most amazing thing ever. That thing absorbed the sweat like a champ! I think it was the best embarrassing decision I've ever had to make.


So Summer - as much as I welcome you with open arms and embrace your wonderful beach days and outdoor dining/drinking - I just wish you'd lay off the humidity and stop causing me to sweat and wheeze all at the same time. If we could just eliminate those factors - I'd be the happiest girl alive!