Why is it so hard to walk normal?! I've broken it down into four categories - I've literally spent a lot of thinking time on this and a lot of observation.
1. The Blatant Slow Walker. This is someone that does not care, has no place to be and is just moseying their way through life. They could care less about their surrounding sidewalk goers and they're happy to just take it all in. while this is enviable to never have to worry about when you get somewhere…please for the love of all that is Holy….GET OUT OF MY WAY!!
2. The Traverser. This person likes to zig zag their way up the sidewalk. Just when you think you can pass them - they cock block you and stand right in front of you. They will allow no suck thing. Their main purpose is to make sure you stay behind them at all times - it's as if they legit have eyes in the back of their heads - just watching your every move. They are among the most difficult to pass. And to anyone behind you - they make you look like a complete fool. You're running, trying to make a pick and go the opposite way - but no chance you sucker! Just succumb to their pace.
3. The Tourist. Ok - complete honesty - we've all been there. We've all been on vacation or in a new city and you just are exploring and looking around - believe me - this is one I struggle with being angry with. However - while you're enjoying yourselves on your lil vacay, some of us still have to navigate this place - so just step to the side. That's all - don’t rush - I don’t want you to miss anything - but please - just move to the side. I love that you're enjoying this place - NYC is one of (if not the) best cities in the world - but I live here - and I need to get to my destination - so please move to the side.
4. The Butt Bumper. Now this is something newer that I've noticed lately and it's driving me utterly bananas. These people will be walking at your clip and moving and we're moving and it's all great then ….STOP. Dead in their tracks. You literally bump right into their butts because you can't stop in time and you have no other place to go. I've prob bumped into about 5 people this week. Why can't you just be aware of your surroundings and if you want to stop, just move over. Don’t stop short or all of a sudden change direction so have I no choice other than to plow into you. It's not fun for you and it's certainly not fun for me.
When I finally make my way around one of these people I have such a sense of pride and joy.
Only to walk two more steps and hit another one of their kind. I'll leave you with this. I think this is by far one of my favorite Jimmy Fallon "Thank You Notes". He just sums it up sooo perfectly! Happy Friday everyone and please - WATCH WHERE YOU WALK!
"Thank you, slow walking family walking in front of me on the sidewalk. No, please, take your time. And definitely spread out, too, so you create a barricade of idiots. I am so thankful that you forced me to walk on the street and risk getting hit by a car in order to pass you so I could resume walking at a normal human pace." - Jimmy Fallon
No comments:
Post a Comment