NUT CAP SHELL

So Spring has Sprung…apparently.  According to my allergies at least.  According to actual temperatures…not so much.  I'm hoping for a lil warm up soon!  A little update on my life…some positive, some not so much.  BUT I know I've been a lil MIA, so this should cover the past few weeks.  It's a lil "Pro Con Pro"…sorority style flashback.

+ I went to Chicago & Houston to see some very fabulous friends.
                

·       In Chicago we did a lil shopping, caught up with old friends, ate/drank (are you seeing a theme here?!), went to RPM (which we ordered just about everything on the menu and it was all amazing - despite not seeing G&B - it was a fabulous time), and we went out and pretended to be young again.  All in all - a fantastic trip.  Chicago is one of my fave cities - the people are great the food is great - so much good going on there!
·       In Houston I went to a rodeo, ate some amazing food, drank some amazing margs and   beers outside and yup - went to a Crawfish Boil.  It was pretty much one of the best weekends ever - further fueling my "maybe I SHOULD move to Texas and just succumb to the fact that I might belong there" theory. 

- I had to sit in a doctor's office waiting for an appointment and this was what I dealt with:

·       A guy bringing his dog in a little bag and pretending like no one is seeing it.  Did I mention this was a doctor's office?!  And the dog would bark and the guy would just like look around like nothing was going on - still pretending he wasn't trying to stealthily sneak a dog into his appointment.

·       The obnoxious woman next to me told the receptionist that she didn't have time to wait (like the rest of us are all just free birds with nothing else to do but wait for the doctor).  Then she was filling out a form for her and her husband and she looked at him and goes "what is your birthday".  Ummm what?!  This is your husband.  He was like - "you don't know?!".  To which she replied "I can't remember everything."  If that relationship isn't rock solid I don’t know what is.  Annnnd then she proceeded to call someone they were discussing a "whore monger"…she was a real peach.

·       Another woman decided that it was in the best interest of the whole waiting room to hear her play whatever ridiculously loud game she was playing on her phone.  Awesome.

+ My co-workers and I decided to organize a House Crawl this past weekend.  It was pretty much amazing.  We went to 3 different apartments, had shirts made, drank too much and just kinda fratted out a bit.  It was a really good bonding experience. 

+ My sister and I met Mindy Kaling.  Yup - that's right - got a picture and all.  We went to an event at Bliss that she was at and next thing we kenw we were lined up waiting to see her…and then all of a sudden we were in a photo booth with her.  My sister sat on her lap, we had 4 "poses"…one of which my sister gave her a noogie.  Sooo that happened.  She was as awesome and fun as you would think she'd be!

+ I did a massive Spring Cleaning - got rid of 4 bags of clothes (donated them of course) and just really cleaned things up!!

- I had to go through stuff I hadn't seen in years...including things I prob wish I never saw again.  I.e. cards from old boyfriends, things I thought I threw out, cards/notes from people I don't even know who they are…aka "Can't wait to see you when you get back.  Have fun with your family.  Love you!! John". Ummmmm I don’t or remember one person named John.  I have zero idea who it is and who sent me such love notes.  

+ Saw a few good plays, movies, TV shows…

·       Bullets Over Broadway with Zach Braff - really good!  It's a new show on Broadway and I definitely recommend it!

·       The Other Woman - my sister and I saw this the other night.  I wasn't expecting to like it as much as I did - honestly I laughed out loud in more m parts than not.  It wasn't like "best movie ever" - but it was exactly what I needed - a nice light rom-com.

·       If you aren't already watching these shows/watched these shows - you need to get on board stat - Southern Charm & Chrisley Knows Best.  Honestly - they are both so amazing.  I literally died over Christly Knows Best - I can't even handle that family. 

+ There's a new hot guy in my apartment building - on my floor - like 3 doors down from me. 

- I stood at the elevator with said gentleman the other day and iddn't know what to do - so we just stood there awkwardly in silence waiting.  Then we got in…I wiped the drool from my mouth …and I was so distracted I forgot to push the button to go to the bottom floor….so up we went to the top!  Then I casually/awkwardly/Lizzie-esque had this convo:
                       Me:  Soooo did you just move in?
                       Him:  Nope been here for about 6 months. How long have you been here?
                       Me:  Four years. (this is going swimmingly)
                       Him:  How do you like it?
                       Me:  It's good - nice and quiet. 
ANNNNND scene!  Not only was that one of the lamest things for me to say - we reached the ground floor and out he went…haven't seen him since.

There you have it people - a (I swear to God this is what I just said in my head as I was typing and went back to type this because it needs explanation) NUT CAP SHELL (I believe I was trying to say both "nut shell" and "recap").  Yup - I'm loosing my marbles!!  Be back soon…just gonna go try to find those quickly!

Images from:  #whatshouldwecallme.tumblr.com

Party Bus In The House Tonight

Guys this past weekend = Sydney's Birthday Bonanza = Success!!

I went down to DC on Friday morning to attend this blissful event - thankfully it was an uneventful train ride.  I couldn't wait to get there!!  We were extremely mature on Friday night and we just went for a very casual dinner with Hillary, home watching programs by 10 pm.  Saturday was not so much in the maturity department. 

Amy rolled into town at the delightful hour of 9 am.  She caught a grossly early flight out of Boston to come to Sydney's bday!  We decided it was in our best interest to get a nice big breakfast, so off to IHOP we went.  Our server's name was Saba and Sydney kept referring to her as "Saba the Hut", so you can imagine that our day was off and running. 

Hillary, Ruby and others started arriving at Sydney's around 11 am and that's when it allllll began.  Bottles popped and drinks flowed.  And then the best part…our party bus rolled on up!!  Yes folks, that's right, we rented a party bus to take us to Annapolis for the day for a lil pub crawl.  Why you ask…simple…we're just that mature!  Is it not normal for a group of 30+ year old women to roll onto a bus filled with alcohol and drive about?! 

Sampson was our driver and he was great.  He obliged our pictures, loud music and overall raucous behavior like a champ!  One of Sydney's co-workers made up this whole spy themed scavenger hunt and it was amaze!  She did such a great job - we even got goody bags!! 

We finally rolled into Annapolis like we owned the joint.

First stop...Pussers.  Yup there's an actual bar called Pussers.  Prob one of the most disgusting names of a place I could think of, but you know, it was great.  We sat outside on the water, drank these things called Pain Killers (hard to swallow at first, then they went down pretty easy!), it was great.  And luckily it was a gorg day - such a tease - but that's another story!  After that we went to 2 other bars, grabbed more drinks and some amaze seafood.  We just really had the best time.  I had so much fun with the girls, there were 10 of us total and it was just perfect.  Everyone was soooo fun and the ride back was more eventful!

We eventually got on the bus, it seemed like we were only there for like an hour, but it was really 4!  That's when things began to go south.  And by south I mean everyone was pretty drunk.  Did I mention there was a stripper pole on the bus??  Because there was.  Did I also mention we brought a bunch of snacks…because somehow most of them managed to be spilled on the floor and became a mushy, gross, disgusting situation.  One of the girls tried to go on the pole, fell to her knees and was covered in goldfish sludge.  Which, side note, she couldn't figure out afterwards why it was like that, like she had bright orange goo on her jeans and she was just like - welp that happened and went out for the night.  

Amazing.  I literally almost wet my pants I was laughing so hard.  

The best part of the whole day, to me at least, I think really sums up our whole experience.  Sydney and I were getting off the bus (at the end when we got back to her apartment) and she looks back at me and this was our exchange:

Sydney:  Ummmm Lizzie where's my purse??  I can't find my bag.  Should I be concerned??
Me:  I mean I'm sure it's around here somewhere - you had it when we got on, right??
Sydney:  I think so.  I mean who knows - I guess it's not a big deal.
Me:  Let's look around (look around to a disgusting mess, bag no where in sight).
Sydney:  Ohhh here it is!  (Reaches into the trash can - yup the trash can - and pulls out her Kate Spade as if it was totally normal)
Me:  Nodding (agreeing that it seemed totally normal)...

We then proceed to go out to dinner and stay out until midnight, at least that's when Amy and I called it a night, Ruby & Sydney rolled in around 3 am.  How - no clue?!  Sunday we all felt amazing - Sydney Uber'd Amy & I a car because she was pretty sure  she'd get a DUI if she tried to drive us anywhere. 

It was just such a delightful weekend.  I love seeing my girlfriends and missed the ones that couldn't make it.  I'm a lucky girl…I have the best most fun most amazing friends a girl could ask for!  Ok - sorry that started to get a lil mushy - I've been all sentimental about these fools lately!!  I'll stop now.  

Wacky Wednesday

Happy Wednesday!!!  We're almost through the week kids!  

Last night I went with a friend to Carnegie Hall to see Lena Dunham & David Sedaris.  It was entitled "Along Together At Last".  My friend had an extra ticket, I thought it might be funny, but I didn't really know too much about David Sedaris before going in.  Pretty sure it was phenomenal!  I Had such a good time and the 2 of them were beyond hilarious.

They both did readings from their books that are coming/just came out.  David Sedaris also read an article that he had just written for the New Yorker.  This article was fantastic.  He has the weird side of dark humor completely captured.  I think hearing him read his work is also such an amazing experience, there are certain ways he says things that allows you to just know it's "ok" to laugh at something.    He has a number of books out too, one in particular is next on my list for this time of year - it's called SantalandDiaries in which he talks about his time as an elf at Macy's, green tights and all! 

Lena Dunham was equally as hilarious and amazing.  She has a new book, Not That Kind of Girl: A Young Woman Tells You What She’s Learned, coming out and I seriously can't wait to ready it.  She read a few excerpts and I literally was crying.  She's just so real and seemingly "normal".  Even her stage presence was hilarious - she got on and was like listen I'm probably going to mispronounce words, fumble, etc., but just go with it.  Nothing pretentious or "important" about her!

As a totally different note/discussion…these 3 things happened to me this morning …

1.  On the bus this woman basically runs on with her son (mind you there are not that many people on, so it's not crowded).  Instead of telling the son to just sit down at a normal seat, she lets him run wild and all the way to the back of the bus.  The bus starts going and he basically flies across the aisle into some woman's lap and she, while trying to get to him, slams about 3 people (myself included) with his scooter.  Let's just say thank God the kid still had his helmut on from his epic scooter ride, which I'm sure consisted of 1 block.  Needless to say all of this and the 2 of them went literally 1 stop.  1 stop.  People are insane.

2.  On this same bus ride there was an angry woman who was older.  Every time the bus stopped she thought it was her stop.  Meanwhile - the bus driver does announce stops and he stopped at every avenue (we were going across town).  Oh also - she was getting off at 6^th Avenue (my stop) and this started at 1^st Ave.  Finally it was her shining moment and the bus was at a light, however she knew her stop was approaching, thought the stopped bus (due to said red light) meant she could just get off (not at the actual stop).  She began pushing on the door and yelling "BACK DOOR - I'M TRYING TO GET OFF!!!  BACK DOOR!!!"  Finally I politely said "we're not at the stop yet" and then she gave me a dirty look, the bus got to the stop and she scooted off.

3.  I get to work, get situated and settled.  Just starting my day and I hear this from one of the secretaries that sits outside my office door:  "This God damn list keeps changing like someone's bad underwear!!"

So I'll leave you with that lil gem.  I'm off to my old stomping grounds tomorrow…D to the C-izzle (does that work…no?!  Sorry I embarrassed myself).  I hope you all have fabulous weekends!!

It's Your Lucky Day!!

Just a quick lil story for your entertainment - or maybe pity - I'm not quite sure which. 

I've become involved in Tarte cosmetics (thanks to Ruby!).  The first tinted moisturizer I got is great, but just slightly darker than my normal skin color (but great for when I have a glowing tan - which happens so often).  SOOO I decided to go into Henri Bendels yesterday to just get a lil bit lighter one.  I was short on time, so I literally slow jogged right up to the counter, I was like "hi I have 12 and I think I need 10, sooooo can you just grab that I can pay and be on my way?!"  The sales woman was annoying (had her once before) - insisted on testing things and finally wound up with the one that I told her I wanted from the beginning.  So she goes to grab it, this is after she tried to push another type on me, but I stuck to my guns and then she convinced me that I was making the right choice.  This is how the rest of the experience went…

Woman:  Ohhh ummm yikes….soooo ummm…looks like we're out of 10, but are you sure you don’t want the other one??

Me:  Yah - I mean I think this kind just suits me best, so I guess I'll just have to get it somewhere else.
Woman:  WELLLLLL we just got a shipment in this morning, so let me run downstairs really quick and see - I'm positive there will be some more in those boxes.
Me:  Oh that's great- thanks.
**Cut to 10 minutes later**
Woman:  (as she running at me through the store with 3 huge boxes) IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAY!!!
Me:  Oh such great news!
**She then proceeds to take out this brush & powder concoction and goes to try it on me. **

Me:  Umm I'm sorry I don’t really have time for this, can I just have the tinted moisturizer and I'll be on my way.
Woman:  OHHH yah so about that - we didn't have it.  BUT I totally think the other one is the best way to go anyway.
Me:  (getting slightly more annoyed as the time passes and now questioning why I'm even here) OK YOUR WERE YELLING HOW IT WAS MY LUCKY DAY SO I FIGURED THAT YOU HAD IT.  FINE JUST GIVE ME THE OTHER ONE.  (oh and I've also been there for 0ver 20 minutes, so I'm getting hella angry now).
Woman: (scurries over to the drawer searching…searching…searching…) Oh shoot (in this pathetic meeke voice)…we're out of that one too.

Me:  (say no words…look of death…storm out).

 

Happy almost Friday everyone!!  I'm heading to Deep Creek Lake with some of my girlies!!  Enjoy the weekends!!  XOXO

 

Racey AC

Soooooo let's break this lil night down. AC was a blast - it was Sydney's bday so things got a lil cray. Before I get into that though, I just wanted to discuss my Friday night situation. I wound up going to a comedy show last minute at Caroline's. And can we talk about how I basically peed my pants. I haven't laughed that hard in quite some time. There were three comedians…2 openers and then one guy headlined. They were all fantastic and so different and I loved them all. If you ever get a chance to see/hear any of these guys - Josh Rabinowitz & John Mulaney in particular - I highly recommend you do it. Absolutely hilarious.


Ok so onto the next one. I took the train to CCK and then we got to make the drive down to AC together. Great catching up time and so nice to have company on the journey!! We got to Revel. Ummm can we talk about this. It's amazing. Soooo clean (we all know how I feel about that), no smoking, very open/spacious, good restaurants, I could go on. The rooms were also fantastic, beds were comfy and the showers were phenom. We met up with the other girls, had a great lunch at Village Whiskey and started the celebrating! After lunch we got the lay of the land and then CCK and Bessie went home for the night. That's when things started to unravel. Me, Sydney, Hilary & Kit were left to our own devises! We shopped around a little bit and then we grabbed a drink at the bar (one of many). Eventually we made our way back to our room to get ready for the night. Don’t worry I tested the shower & the shower caps - both worked fabulously. After we all got fresh to death we headed to dinner.

Dinner was at Buddakan. It's basically Asian Fusion and it was absolutely amazing. We got a bunch of different things and shared it all. I was so content and pleased. We had a great time at dinner and just had a nice relaxing meal. I know there are a few throughout the country, so I highly recommend it if you have a chance. Then the fun started…our cab ride back was insane. The guy drove like 9000 miles an hour and "Mo Money Mo Problems" came on the radio…we asked to turn it up a lil bit…next thing it's blaring as we're careening down the street. We roll up to our hotel with it blasting and of course stares all around.

Our first stop for the night was a bit aggressive - Ivan Kane’s Royal Jelly Burlesque Nightclub. Now we thought there'd be tables/seats for us. We hadn't even fully digested - I was only on my first round of Tums. HOWEVER, once we got in, we were enamored and the music was just so good. So to paint a picture it's this darkish room and in the center/on the ceiling are basically runways for girls to walk around/dance/be weird/wear nude colored unitards.

It was nuts. There was also a guy who pretended he was Snoop Dogg (or should I say Snoop Lion) and I honestly think he really believed he was. The people watching was just beyond. After awhile, we were all having trouble standing due to feet/heels to high/issues. Right before we were getting ready to go a girl who was totally out of control came crashing down on my foot (with her heels) and then proceeded to spill her beer down my jeans…so that was basically final straw and a sign for us to leave (ps - my foot is basically purple from my toes to my ankle...I wasn't even trying to be dramatic!). With that Sydney literally threw her whole drink (glass and all) in the garbage and the signature move came out…her yelling "Lizzie" while swinging her arm in the air in a circular motion…round 'em up style if you will.

So we ran back to the room to all change into our flats. God we're so old. But you know what - best decision we made all day. Proper foot wear is always a must…as Sydney's mother so often tells me. Then we were off again and headed to the next bar, Social. This was our jam. There was a band playing, Garden State Radio Band - ummmm they were amazing. Like I want to see them daily kind of amazing. They were such a phenom cover band. They played everything from oldies to top hits and were soooo good. If you can see them - I'd do it. So basically I was in my glory dancing up a storm with Kit. I look over and this guy is just awkwardly sidling up to me and kinda dancing around me/with me/not really/I had no idea what was going on. Kit literally burst out laughing and says "I think your friend wants to talk to you". So after a few more awkward encounters I finally started the conversation and I kid you not this was how it went…

Me: Hi, I'm Lizzie.
Him: Oh right yah I'm Tom.
Awkward silence
Him: So do you come here often?
Me: Um not really, first time here, having fun, it's a great place (rambling to fill the silence).
Him: Sooo how old are you?
Me: I'm 32.
Him: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! (Mouth open widely, eyes like popping out of his head). NOOOOOOO WAAAAYYYYY. You DO NOT LOOK 32…I'd say 25 tops - and I'm not even trying to flatter you.

Me: (feeling ever so comfortable with my age) Ummm well that's quite the reaction, how old are you?

Him: I’m 23. Where do you live?
Me: NYC, you?
Him: In Little Ferry with my parents, but it's only like 20 minutes from the city.
Me: Yup, I know the town.
Him: Soooo I mean yah, sooooo like ummmm, like ummmm, what are you looking for?

Me: Excuse me?

Him: Like what are you looking for? I mean do you wannna….

Me: Well lets just stop right there. (thinking - am I being like propositioned?? Like am I a hooker?!) I think I'm gonna just go with my friends (and I grabbed Kit and walked away).

Like why is this the only guy that spoke to me the whole trip?! Sydney and I even made a pact that we were supposed to find brothers that we could marry and this was the fool that I attracted?? Anywho….we continued to dance and drink and sing and just have a fabulous time. After awhile we went out to the casino and gambled a bit. I threw down $20 on roulette and lost in about 2.2 seconds. The only game that I thought was profitable were the slots - Sydney and I played "Grease" and basically won big. We were sitting there and all of a sudden both our machines started going off, flashing, loud noises. We didn't even know what was going on. But I won $60 and she won $100 - amazing! We finally decided to call it a night, grabbed some food and went to bed. Don't worry - it was 4 am. The old hags made it till 4 am!!

The next day we slowly got ourselves together. I had to catch the bus. It was heinous. It's not so much the bus/the ride it's who sits next to you. Literally this guy getting on, I saw him in line and he looked like the biggest creeper ever. like ever. he walks onto the bus, takes a look around and of course decides to sit next to me. He then proceeds to basically come into my seat and grossly sleep - ewww I'm sceeved out just thinking about it. I hate the flashbacks.

Soooo there you have it. And then I got home…ordered food…watched the Oscars and became increasingly more depressed that it was Sunday night…my trip was over…and I had to work the next day!!

Oh Ron...Do Go ON!!

Hello friends!  Happy gross Tuesday!  It's raining and not pleasant here - so hopefully it's a lil nicer where you are.  How were all the weekends?  Mine was pretty solid!  I'll recap for you.

Well my bday was on Friday, so there's that.  I woke up, got out of bed and said - make this a good day!  I didn't feel like doing anything, but I was trying to pump myself up.  So I took extra time doing my hair & makeup, put on new outfit, and embraced the day.  I left my apartment and it was kinda misting out, but not too bad.  I literally didn't even make it up the block and the skies opened up - TORENTIAL down pour.  I was like a drowned rat. 

I had an umbrella but it didn't do a thing with the sideways rain that was going on.  I finally got to work and I was basically wearing no shirt because I had on a white button down.  So it was like I was just wearing a skirt and my bra.  One of the "head guys" at work who's about 78 years old was like "umm do you want a shirt, I have an extra in my closet".  Totally sweet, but I just stomped passed and mumbled "I'll be in my office wringing myself out - see you in an hour".  And then my secretary scurried in and gave me her desk fan which she set up for me so it would blow in my face and try to dry me off.  Oh and did I mention that my hari was a rats nest and I had makeup streaming down my face?!  Oh I didn't - well that happened!  And don’t worry I'm still using bronzer to pretend I'm still tan from the summer - so my face was basically half brown/half white and I had mascara dripping down.  So that's how the day started - awesome.  The rest of the actual day didn't improve by much.  And all my friends here weren't going to be here that night, so I planned on just going home and wallowing. 

So I left work, went and got a mani/pedi - trying to salvage the day.  After that a girl I work with (who was supposed to be going out of town) texted me and told me to meet them at this bar because she was going to stay in the city after all.  So I was back and forth and then forced myself out.  And I'm glad I did - it wound up being a great night!  Just a few work peeps and a lot of alcohol.  We went to a few different bars and things were getting a lil cray.  We randomly met these 2 men from Haiti who were amazing.  They were older and talking to us for awhile.  Oh this was after some other man spilled his glass of red wine down my leather bag (that I got in Barcelona) and I almost lost it/burst into tears.  Anywho…the one guy, Ron, was quite a character.  At one point I was standing with my work crush (oh don’t worry he was there all night buying me drinks and having fun) and this was our exchange with Ron:

Ron:  Are you 2 brohter and sister??

Us:  (giggling/shocked because we look nothing alike) umm no!

Ron:  Well good because you 2 need to date!

Us:  (laughing awkwardly, giggling, me looking at the floor/turning purple, etc.) 

So basically we're married now - at least according to Ron.  Soooo after that we wound up at this dive bar. Really fun - and this is when things start to get hazy.  I know I invited myself to a co-workers wedding (awesome) and I know I took myself home around 2 am.  I also know that I changed my shoes on the sidewalk. I also know that I woke up on my couch in a t-shirt and undies around 6 am with the TV & lights on with Whole Foods mashed potatoes in front of me.  So choose your own adventure as to how my night ended. 

Then Saturday morning came and I felt atrocious.  I was heading to West Chester, PA to see some of the girls.  I made a miraculous recovery though by the time I got there and it was all good.  I was able to power through and have another fab night!  We went to a great dinner, caught up, and went out to few fun bars.  All of us pretending we still "have it"!!

All in all it was a great weekend - despite it being my birthday!  Happy work week - we're almost there!! 

What Is The Universe Trying To Tell Me?!

Hey kids, lil 'ol me here!  Sorry for the long pause - things have been beyond hectic, but I'll give you a few updates on my life and what's been going on in good 'ol Lizzie-ville.  Apparently I'm into the "'ol's" today. 

1.  I went to DC this past weekend - yup my old stomping grounds!!  It was sooo much fun.  Jason (Ruby's husband - ps he picked his name and was super excited about it - best thing ever!) picked me up from the airport Friday night and then it began!  I met Ruby at their house, we changed, got ready and into the city we went!  We met up with a bunch of my old work cronies and Sydney even surprised me! Hilary and Kit met up with us later too.  Things got wayyyy out of control, as per usual with this old work crowd.  We basically just had a debaucherous evening that ended with me throwing up in an ally (which may or may not have been a gas station, but I'm sticking to an ally because it sounds more classy).  It was one of the most fun nights ever!  I woke up on Ruby's couch, fully clothed, with my hoop earrings still in.  Saturday was not as fun.  The girls came over for brunch and I was so not feeling well!  I tried to drink a lil bit, but that just wasn't an option.  So we all just hung out and had a low key day.  My flight back was super early on Sunday, so it actually was for the best that things remained under control!

2.  I saw American Reunion with Giuliana on Sunday. Seriously - it wasn't as good as I hoped it would be.  There were definitely a few funny parts, but I just really hoped they'd knock it out of the park and it was kind of flat lined for me.  BUT I mean I had to see it, it was part of my youth and generation.  I mean I was class of 1999, too!  BUT after the movie we walked around our neighborhood adn enjoyed the gorg weather.  I'm such a nerd, but I really love where I live in this big crazy city!

3.  Not only did my Pilates class kick my butt on Monday, my spin class kicked my tush yesterday!  Like I'm having trouble moving people!  And I have another Pilates session today!  Wahhhh!

4.  TV notes:  Giuliana & Bill is making me sob like every episode.  I'm so obsessed and I want to be like in their marriage - I heart them sooo much.   The Voice is unbelievable!  I'm like in shock after every episode.  

Last night was no different - my girl RaeLynn got sent home - NOT COOL!!  But it was a hard choice, I just think she's so darling!  And can we discuss Adam Levine for just a minute.  Like I want to jump his bones and his little performance only solidified that we were obviously meant to be married.  I'm just saying.

5.  Lastly, I've been feeling a little "meh" lately.  Can't quite explain, but just not myself and a little "down in the dumps".  Well I think the universe is trying to help me express my feelings because I kid you NOT this was my "playlist" that was completely RANDOM on my walk to work this morning:

Survivor - Destiny's Child

I Wanna Go - Britney Spears

Empire State of Mind - Jay Z

Wonderful World - James Morrison

Rolling in the Deep - Adele

I mean - COME ON!!!  Like could this be anymore telling of my life right now?!  INSANITY!!

Ok that's all for now folks, but I promise I'll be better…and by promise I mean…

The Night Dana Carvey Wouldn't Leave Me Alone/I Heart Austin

Ok - "surrrry folks - parks closed - moose outside shoulda told ya!"  And if you don't get that reference I sorta feel sorry for you.  

Anywho - sorry for the delay - I had some brother's wedding things to tend to last week!  Their big day is coming up in 2 months!!  Wahhoooo!!  But I digress…now back to my story!

Thursday Night

Hazel had a work happy hour that she had to attend/run/organize/be everything for.  So I joined her - never one to turn down free food/drinks and it was another gorg night!  Basically after a little while, I was being more awkward then I've ever been.  No one really wanted to talk to me and one gentleman actually said "you look like a lost soul".   So that was my cue to exit and just sit myself at the bar and watch basketball until she wrapped up!  So I headed to the outdoor bar, got a seat and was answering emails, watching the game, entertaining myself.  Next to me was this guy - I swear to God was  Dana Carvey look-alike.  He even talked like him - that voice he does in the "isn't that special" skit.  

Oh and he was a office furniture salesman.  Dying.  Well he took a liking to me and would.not.stop talking!  He was about 50+ and I really had no interest.  He kept telling me how pretty I was, asking about dating in NYC, said he'd like to come visit.  Oh that's right folks - he was looking for an invite to come visit - what?!?!  My favorite line was when he looked at me through his spectacles and said "you have really pretty eyes. Everyone tells me that too.  We have like the same eyes.  Let me look closer (leans in) - yup they're the same."  What is going on?!  I wanted to crawl under the bar stool and cry.  This was the best TX had to offer me?!  I'm sorry - he was a nice man, just came on a little thick and I clearly wasn't into it.  I was very polite and kind though, I wasn't rude.  Eventually he left - sigh of relief all the way around!

Hazel finished up and had invited her brother and his wife to join us for a few drinks.  It was great to meet them - totally love!  We hung out for awhile - it was just so nice out we didn't want to leave!  We had a great time!!

Friday

Austin day!!!  Yippeeeee I get to see Hermione!  I got up and Hazel had to go to the office for a few hours.  So I went to breakfast at this place - Twin Sisters.  It was great - a nice leisurely morning!  Then I headed back to meet Hazel and got ready for our trip to Austin. 

We left and grabbed lunch on the way - prob the most amazing place I've ever been to.  We had BBQ at Rudy's that was the best I've had in my life.  

It's served on paper - that's right - just paper.  And we had some sides which were even more amazing.  The clientele was straight up Texas - I loved every second of it! 

We got up to Austin and headed right to Hermione's apartment.  After our initial yelling/squealing with excitement over seeing each other we all get ready for dinner.  First we had a drink at this great Mexican place then we headed to Lamberts - again - amazing.  I think I prob gained like 10 pounds on this trip! After that we went out to a few bars - so much fun!  Some of the best people watching I've ever seen!! 

Saturday morning Hermione had to head out of town - wahhh - but Hazel and I got to stay at her apt!  We went to breakfast at this place - soooo hometowny I loved it.  I had "migas" - yah that's right I know the lingo.  For those of you NOT in the know - it's like eggs & tortillas.  They were superb!  Only in TX do you get chips & salsa with your breakfast - it was fabulous.  Then Hazel took me on a tour of campus and downtown Austin!  I hit up the bookstore - saw a few key places.  After that we went for a walk around the lake - again - weather was amazing! 

The afternoon was spent a great bar - sitting outside - enjoying some beer!  We watched the basketball games, a few of her friends stopped by, nice and relaxing!  We also went to this area of Austin - Rainey Street.  Basically this guy just bought up some old houses and converted them into bars - it's the coolest little section.  We went to Clive - it was fabulous!  Here are some pics:

We didn't stay out too late - I had to get up at 4:30 AM for my flight, which was not the most fun - BUT no biggie! 

Sunday

Sunday came wayyyy to quickly.  I was so sad to leave Hazel!  I had such a good trip and it was fun to see a new city.  I'm pretty much obsessed with Austin and would love to go back soon!  It's such an amazing city!  It's never fun to come back from vacay - but it was good to be home in my apartment and back into a routine!

Tejas Part 2

Ok soooo waking up in San Antonio!!  Wahoo!  The weather could not have been better the whole time I was there - it was just picture perfect!  Here's a little summary of my stay in the big SA.

Wednesday

I got up, had coffee with Hazel and we chatted a bit.  She had to go to work, so I just hung out for a bit and then headed out.  I went and got a great mani/pedi.  Don’t worry I was helping all the workers with their translations.  They kept running up to me with their new iPad and asking questions on meanings and pronunciation.  Basically I was in there for about 2 hours and most of it was spent in "classroom mode". I loved every second - and my mani is still intact which is quite amazing.  I got this color - which I'm completely obsessed with!

Then I had a great little "hometown" lunch at this place called "EZs".  

Loved all the local watching! They even had sweet potato tater tots - I'm sorry - don't mind if I do!

Now I needed a little relaxation station.  Hazel has a pool at her apartment complex, so I took myself over there and laid out for a few hours.  I'm reading Mindy Kaling's (Kelly Kapour from the Office) latest book - it's hilarious.  

So it has been keeping me quite entertained!

Hazel got home from work a little early, so we were able to head out to a low key happy hour.  It was so nice, we sat outside at a wine bar, had a glass of wine, got all caught up!  It was great.  Then we went to this great Mexican place for dinner - so delish.  We got home watched a little TV, then we both crashed. I think we were both still exhausted from the late night before!

Thursday

Another amazing day!  I went with Hazel to her office and then we went downtown together.  She had a work event/meetings, so it worked out well.  I took myself to the Alamo - where it all went down!  It's not too crazy exciting, BUT it's history, so my dad was thrilled that I went.  

Then I walked along the Riverwalk - it's just so adorable.  If you've never been to San Antonio - the Riverwalk is an area of the city.  It's this stretch of the river and on either side of it there are a ton of little restaurants and shops.  They all have outdoor seating and it's just so cute.  Here's a little picture:

I grabbed lunch outside, read my book, watched people, may or may not have had a margarita.  It was so nice and relaxing.  Then I went to a park and read until Hazel was done with her meetings. 

Thursday night she had a work happy hour that I attended - I'll have to give you more details on that one tomorrow!  Duty calls and I need to get back to work!!

Just My Life For The Past Week...

Howdy!  So I know I've been absent for a little while - BUT for good reason - I was on a mini-vacay!!  I went out to good 'ol Tejas to enjoy some great friends, good food & fabulous drinks!!  So I'll break it down for you - prob in 2 parts.  OH and I also saw Isabella in Philly - I'll do that first - ok I'm scattered!

Philly - The City of UNbrotherly Love

Let me break this down for you in bullets, so this post isn't like 8 pages long.  Basically I went for the weekend - got in Friday night/left Sunday morning.  Here are  few takeaways:

-We went to this little hole in the wall Mexican place for dinner  with my brother & his fiancé.  It was hilarious - there was insane décor all over the place, they were playing Frank Sinatra, there was only room for about 20 people.  It was hysterical.  The waiter helping us had tinted glasses, hair slicked back, a white cowboy-esque type shirt on, denim faded jeans and a smile that wouldn't quit.  About half way through our dinner a private party rolled through and they were basically kicking us out.  The food was good, though and I had a fantastic grapefruit margarita!!

-Saturday was spent wandering around and shopping.  Just loving the gorg weather on St. Patrick's Day in my Ireland shirt.  UNTIL some homeless woman yelled this to me - in front of all of Philly - "YOU'RE NOT IRISH - YOU'RE A WHORE!"  Oh ummm ok.  So that was fun.  God I just LOVE Philly!!

-We then went out to a bar to join the rest of the city in SPD debauchery.  We got to the 2^nd place and eventually got a few seats at the bar.  It was great - we just hung out, watched people, drank some beer, had a few laughs.  The perfect way to spend the evening!  UNTIL some guy comes rolling up next to me and is immediately angry.  Like before he even got to me, he hated my guts.  This was our exchange (may be slightly altered - but no joke this is basically how it went):

Me:  (sitting quietly drinking my beer - chatting with Isabella & her friend.)
Guy:  I'm a male nurse.
Me:  Cool
Guy:  I work in the operating room and see heart surgery.
Me:  That's great.
Guy:  You don’t even know - I'm better than the surgeon.
Me:  Oh really? (really not trying to engage or wanting to talk to him)
Guy:  I hope have a heart attack die.
Me:  Umm that's a little aggressive and unnecessary.
Guy:  You don’t even know how great I am as a male nurse and in the operating room, basically I'm the best in there - above the surgeons & doctors.
Me:  Ok - well I'm just going to drink my beer and pretend you're not an awful human being.
Guy:  If you had a heart attack you'd be transported to my hospital because it’s the best.
Me:  Welp I don’t live here, so there's that.  Please just stop talking to me.

Eventually Isabella's friend stepped in with some choice words and he vanished.  

-We were home, ordering dinner by 9:30 pm.  Period.  

-Sunday we got up, grabbed breakfast & went to drive me to the train station.  Isabella's car wouldn't start.  Womp womp - battery died.  Had to grab a cab.  Train ride back was uneventful.

Back in the good 'ol NYC

Giuliana & I saw 21 Jump Street when I got back.  Let me just say - I basically peed my pants.  Like I haven't laughed this hard in a movie prob since Bridesmaids.  It was stellar.  I actually have to go and watch it again because I’m sure I missed things on account of my laughter.

Off to Tejas I Go...Can't wait to see Hazel & Hermione (btw - this was her choice for a name)!!

I left Tuesday night.  I was basically running through the airport for absolutely no reason and got to my gate in a full out sweat patrol.  Oh don't worry - I just had to have my dermatologist prescribe me prescription strength deodorant (fingers crossed it works)!  I grabbed some dinner and the off I went.  I sat next to this high school/college boy who was quiet as a mouse - so I was thrilled!  And I flew JetBlue, so I didn't even have to miss out on my evening shows!  Amazing!  I got to Austin and Hazel was there to fetch me.  It was really late so we just headed right back to San Antonio to her new apartment!  LOVE - and she a new puppy which is adorbs!  We pretty much went right to bed - we were both exhausted! 

Ok so I'll pick up here tomorrow!  The adventure continues!!!