NUT CAP SHELL

So Spring has Sprung…apparently.  According to my allergies at least.  According to actual temperatures…not so much.  I'm hoping for a lil warm up soon!  A little update on my life…some positive, some not so much.  BUT I know I've been a lil MIA, so this should cover the past few weeks.  It's a lil "Pro Con Pro"…sorority style flashback.

+ I went to Chicago & Houston to see some very fabulous friends.
                

·       In Chicago we did a lil shopping, caught up with old friends, ate/drank (are you seeing a theme here?!), went to RPM (which we ordered just about everything on the menu and it was all amazing - despite not seeing G&B - it was a fabulous time), and we went out and pretended to be young again.  All in all - a fantastic trip.  Chicago is one of my fave cities - the people are great the food is great - so much good going on there!
·       In Houston I went to a rodeo, ate some amazing food, drank some amazing margs and   beers outside and yup - went to a Crawfish Boil.  It was pretty much one of the best weekends ever - further fueling my "maybe I SHOULD move to Texas and just succumb to the fact that I might belong there" theory. 

- I had to sit in a doctor's office waiting for an appointment and this was what I dealt with:

·       A guy bringing his dog in a little bag and pretending like no one is seeing it.  Did I mention this was a doctor's office?!  And the dog would bark and the guy would just like look around like nothing was going on - still pretending he wasn't trying to stealthily sneak a dog into his appointment.

·       The obnoxious woman next to me told the receptionist that she didn't have time to wait (like the rest of us are all just free birds with nothing else to do but wait for the doctor).  Then she was filling out a form for her and her husband and she looked at him and goes "what is your birthday".  Ummm what?!  This is your husband.  He was like - "you don't know?!".  To which she replied "I can't remember everything."  If that relationship isn't rock solid I don’t know what is.  Annnnd then she proceeded to call someone they were discussing a "whore monger"…she was a real peach.

·       Another woman decided that it was in the best interest of the whole waiting room to hear her play whatever ridiculously loud game she was playing on her phone.  Awesome.

+ My co-workers and I decided to organize a House Crawl this past weekend.  It was pretty much amazing.  We went to 3 different apartments, had shirts made, drank too much and just kinda fratted out a bit.  It was a really good bonding experience. 

+ My sister and I met Mindy Kaling.  Yup - that's right - got a picture and all.  We went to an event at Bliss that she was at and next thing we kenw we were lined up waiting to see her…and then all of a sudden we were in a photo booth with her.  My sister sat on her lap, we had 4 "poses"…one of which my sister gave her a noogie.  Sooo that happened.  She was as awesome and fun as you would think she'd be!

+ I did a massive Spring Cleaning - got rid of 4 bags of clothes (donated them of course) and just really cleaned things up!!

- I had to go through stuff I hadn't seen in years...including things I prob wish I never saw again.  I.e. cards from old boyfriends, things I thought I threw out, cards/notes from people I don't even know who they are…aka "Can't wait to see you when you get back.  Have fun with your family.  Love you!! John". Ummmmm I don’t or remember one person named John.  I have zero idea who it is and who sent me such love notes.  

+ Saw a few good plays, movies, TV shows…

·       Bullets Over Broadway with Zach Braff - really good!  It's a new show on Broadway and I definitely recommend it!

·       The Other Woman - my sister and I saw this the other night.  I wasn't expecting to like it as much as I did - honestly I laughed out loud in more m parts than not.  It wasn't like "best movie ever" - but it was exactly what I needed - a nice light rom-com.

·       If you aren't already watching these shows/watched these shows - you need to get on board stat - Southern Charm & Chrisley Knows Best.  Honestly - they are both so amazing.  I literally died over Christly Knows Best - I can't even handle that family. 

+ There's a new hot guy in my apartment building - on my floor - like 3 doors down from me. 

- I stood at the elevator with said gentleman the other day and iddn't know what to do - so we just stood there awkwardly in silence waiting.  Then we got in…I wiped the drool from my mouth …and I was so distracted I forgot to push the button to go to the bottom floor….so up we went to the top!  Then I casually/awkwardly/Lizzie-esque had this convo:
                       Me:  Soooo did you just move in?
                       Him:  Nope been here for about 6 months. How long have you been here?
                       Me:  Four years. (this is going swimmingly)
                       Him:  How do you like it?
                       Me:  It's good - nice and quiet. 
ANNNNND scene!  Not only was that one of the lamest things for me to say - we reached the ground floor and out he went…haven't seen him since.

There you have it people - a (I swear to God this is what I just said in my head as I was typing and went back to type this because it needs explanation) NUT CAP SHELL (I believe I was trying to say both "nut shell" and "recap").  Yup - I'm loosing my marbles!!  Be back soon…just gonna go try to find those quickly!

Images from:  #whatshouldwecallme.tumblr.com

Party Bus In The House Tonight

Guys this past weekend = Sydney's Birthday Bonanza = Success!!

I went down to DC on Friday morning to attend this blissful event - thankfully it was an uneventful train ride.  I couldn't wait to get there!!  We were extremely mature on Friday night and we just went for a very casual dinner with Hillary, home watching programs by 10 pm.  Saturday was not so much in the maturity department. 

Amy rolled into town at the delightful hour of 9 am.  She caught a grossly early flight out of Boston to come to Sydney's bday!  We decided it was in our best interest to get a nice big breakfast, so off to IHOP we went.  Our server's name was Saba and Sydney kept referring to her as "Saba the Hut", so you can imagine that our day was off and running. 

Hillary, Ruby and others started arriving at Sydney's around 11 am and that's when it allllll began.  Bottles popped and drinks flowed.  And then the best part…our party bus rolled on up!!  Yes folks, that's right, we rented a party bus to take us to Annapolis for the day for a lil pub crawl.  Why you ask…simple…we're just that mature!  Is it not normal for a group of 30+ year old women to roll onto a bus filled with alcohol and drive about?! 

Sampson was our driver and he was great.  He obliged our pictures, loud music and overall raucous behavior like a champ!  One of Sydney's co-workers made up this whole spy themed scavenger hunt and it was amaze!  She did such a great job - we even got goody bags!! 

We finally rolled into Annapolis like we owned the joint.

First stop...Pussers.  Yup there's an actual bar called Pussers.  Prob one of the most disgusting names of a place I could think of, but you know, it was great.  We sat outside on the water, drank these things called Pain Killers (hard to swallow at first, then they went down pretty easy!), it was great.  And luckily it was a gorg day - such a tease - but that's another story!  After that we went to 2 other bars, grabbed more drinks and some amaze seafood.  We just really had the best time.  I had so much fun with the girls, there were 10 of us total and it was just perfect.  Everyone was soooo fun and the ride back was more eventful!

We eventually got on the bus, it seemed like we were only there for like an hour, but it was really 4!  That's when things began to go south.  And by south I mean everyone was pretty drunk.  Did I mention there was a stripper pole on the bus??  Because there was.  Did I also mention we brought a bunch of snacks…because somehow most of them managed to be spilled on the floor and became a mushy, gross, disgusting situation.  One of the girls tried to go on the pole, fell to her knees and was covered in goldfish sludge.  Which, side note, she couldn't figure out afterwards why it was like that, like she had bright orange goo on her jeans and she was just like - welp that happened and went out for the night.  

Amazing.  I literally almost wet my pants I was laughing so hard.  

The best part of the whole day, to me at least, I think really sums up our whole experience.  Sydney and I were getting off the bus (at the end when we got back to her apartment) and she looks back at me and this was our exchange:

Sydney:  Ummmm Lizzie where's my purse??  I can't find my bag.  Should I be concerned??
Me:  I mean I'm sure it's around here somewhere - you had it when we got on, right??
Sydney:  I think so.  I mean who knows - I guess it's not a big deal.
Me:  Let's look around (look around to a disgusting mess, bag no where in sight).
Sydney:  Ohhh here it is!  (Reaches into the trash can - yup the trash can - and pulls out her Kate Spade as if it was totally normal)
Me:  Nodding (agreeing that it seemed totally normal)...

We then proceed to go out to dinner and stay out until midnight, at least that's when Amy and I called it a night, Ruby & Sydney rolled in around 3 am.  How - no clue?!  Sunday we all felt amazing - Sydney Uber'd Amy & I a car because she was pretty sure  she'd get a DUI if she tried to drive us anywhere. 

It was just such a delightful weekend.  I love seeing my girlfriends and missed the ones that couldn't make it.  I'm a lucky girl…I have the best most fun most amazing friends a girl could ask for!  Ok - sorry that started to get a lil mushy - I've been all sentimental about these fools lately!!  I'll stop now.  

Racey AC

Soooooo let's break this lil night down. AC was a blast - it was Sydney's bday so things got a lil cray. Before I get into that though, I just wanted to discuss my Friday night situation. I wound up going to a comedy show last minute at Caroline's. And can we talk about how I basically peed my pants. I haven't laughed that hard in quite some time. There were three comedians…2 openers and then one guy headlined. They were all fantastic and so different and I loved them all. If you ever get a chance to see/hear any of these guys - Josh Rabinowitz & John Mulaney in particular - I highly recommend you do it. Absolutely hilarious.


Ok so onto the next one. I took the train to CCK and then we got to make the drive down to AC together. Great catching up time and so nice to have company on the journey!! We got to Revel. Ummm can we talk about this. It's amazing. Soooo clean (we all know how I feel about that), no smoking, very open/spacious, good restaurants, I could go on. The rooms were also fantastic, beds were comfy and the showers were phenom. We met up with the other girls, had a great lunch at Village Whiskey and started the celebrating! After lunch we got the lay of the land and then CCK and Bessie went home for the night. That's when things started to unravel. Me, Sydney, Hilary & Kit were left to our own devises! We shopped around a little bit and then we grabbed a drink at the bar (one of many). Eventually we made our way back to our room to get ready for the night. Don’t worry I tested the shower & the shower caps - both worked fabulously. After we all got fresh to death we headed to dinner.

Dinner was at Buddakan. It's basically Asian Fusion and it was absolutely amazing. We got a bunch of different things and shared it all. I was so content and pleased. We had a great time at dinner and just had a nice relaxing meal. I know there are a few throughout the country, so I highly recommend it if you have a chance. Then the fun started…our cab ride back was insane. The guy drove like 9000 miles an hour and "Mo Money Mo Problems" came on the radio…we asked to turn it up a lil bit…next thing it's blaring as we're careening down the street. We roll up to our hotel with it blasting and of course stares all around.

Our first stop for the night was a bit aggressive - Ivan Kane’s Royal Jelly Burlesque Nightclub. Now we thought there'd be tables/seats for us. We hadn't even fully digested - I was only on my first round of Tums. HOWEVER, once we got in, we were enamored and the music was just so good. So to paint a picture it's this darkish room and in the center/on the ceiling are basically runways for girls to walk around/dance/be weird/wear nude colored unitards.

It was nuts. There was also a guy who pretended he was Snoop Dogg (or should I say Snoop Lion) and I honestly think he really believed he was. The people watching was just beyond. After awhile, we were all having trouble standing due to feet/heels to high/issues. Right before we were getting ready to go a girl who was totally out of control came crashing down on my foot (with her heels) and then proceeded to spill her beer down my jeans…so that was basically final straw and a sign for us to leave (ps - my foot is basically purple from my toes to my ankle...I wasn't even trying to be dramatic!). With that Sydney literally threw her whole drink (glass and all) in the garbage and the signature move came out…her yelling "Lizzie" while swinging her arm in the air in a circular motion…round 'em up style if you will.

So we ran back to the room to all change into our flats. God we're so old. But you know what - best decision we made all day. Proper foot wear is always a must…as Sydney's mother so often tells me. Then we were off again and headed to the next bar, Social. This was our jam. There was a band playing, Garden State Radio Band - ummmm they were amazing. Like I want to see them daily kind of amazing. They were such a phenom cover band. They played everything from oldies to top hits and were soooo good. If you can see them - I'd do it. So basically I was in my glory dancing up a storm with Kit. I look over and this guy is just awkwardly sidling up to me and kinda dancing around me/with me/not really/I had no idea what was going on. Kit literally burst out laughing and says "I think your friend wants to talk to you". So after a few more awkward encounters I finally started the conversation and I kid you not this was how it went…

Me: Hi, I'm Lizzie.
Him: Oh right yah I'm Tom.
Awkward silence
Him: So do you come here often?
Me: Um not really, first time here, having fun, it's a great place (rambling to fill the silence).
Him: Sooo how old are you?
Me: I'm 32.
Him: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! (Mouth open widely, eyes like popping out of his head). NOOOOOOO WAAAAYYYYY. You DO NOT LOOK 32…I'd say 25 tops - and I'm not even trying to flatter you.

Me: (feeling ever so comfortable with my age) Ummm well that's quite the reaction, how old are you?

Him: I’m 23. Where do you live?
Me: NYC, you?
Him: In Little Ferry with my parents, but it's only like 20 minutes from the city.
Me: Yup, I know the town.
Him: Soooo I mean yah, sooooo like ummmm, like ummmm, what are you looking for?

Me: Excuse me?

Him: Like what are you looking for? I mean do you wannna….

Me: Well lets just stop right there. (thinking - am I being like propositioned?? Like am I a hooker?!) I think I'm gonna just go with my friends (and I grabbed Kit and walked away).

Like why is this the only guy that spoke to me the whole trip?! Sydney and I even made a pact that we were supposed to find brothers that we could marry and this was the fool that I attracted?? Anywho….we continued to dance and drink and sing and just have a fabulous time. After awhile we went out to the casino and gambled a bit. I threw down $20 on roulette and lost in about 2.2 seconds. The only game that I thought was profitable were the slots - Sydney and I played "Grease" and basically won big. We were sitting there and all of a sudden both our machines started going off, flashing, loud noises. We didn't even know what was going on. But I won $60 and she won $100 - amazing! We finally decided to call it a night, grabbed some food and went to bed. Don't worry - it was 4 am. The old hags made it till 4 am!!

The next day we slowly got ourselves together. I had to catch the bus. It was heinous. It's not so much the bus/the ride it's who sits next to you. Literally this guy getting on, I saw him in line and he looked like the biggest creeper ever. like ever. he walks onto the bus, takes a look around and of course decides to sit next to me. He then proceeds to basically come into my seat and grossly sleep - ewww I'm sceeved out just thinking about it. I hate the flashbacks.

Soooo there you have it. And then I got home…ordered food…watched the Oscars and became increasingly more depressed that it was Sunday night…my trip was over…and I had to work the next day!!

Happy Monday…I Mean Tuesday

Happy day back from a long weekend!! So gross!! First off - I need to wish a very special someone a happiest of birthdays!! Sydney's bday is today and I hope it's just fabulous!!


 We'll be celebrating this coming weekend in Atlantic City - so more on that to follow!!

I wound up having a great weekend! I had a last minute wedding invitation for Saturday - it was a co-worker, so no offense was taken that I got the invite on Monday! Basically another co-worker was getting married and there were 5 of us that went to the wedding - so much fun. I even got to see my little CCK in between the ceremony & the reception. Don’t worry we rolled in style - NBD we took a limo from NY to NJ. We had bevies in the car and it was just a really fun night. Some dancing, some drinking, some eating, a lil this a lil a that. This was my attire…and I got myself a blowout - which was fab.

Eliza J - sooo flattering - hard to see but there's rouching all along the sides that nicely hides what you don't want seen!

Bandolino - I needed a "pop" of color and these were comf and perfect



Aldo - this bag matched wierdly perfectly to my shoes...perfect tie in for the whole outfit



And some new makeup at Bobbi Brown - also fab!! I'm obsessed with these new things I got and I was obsessed with my makeup artist - there were no blemishes to be had on my face and she did such an unbelievable job. I told her to "make it look like I did it but better". Here are the new products I purchased:

Long-Wear Even Finish Compact Foundation - loving this style of foundation and it truly lasts all day

Lip Balm - it's amazing and leaves your lips soft and the best pink shade

Illuminating Bronzing Powder - it really highlights and brightens your face

After the reception we rolled on back to NYC and proceeded to go to another bar - because that was necessary. It's not like I was just singing Public Enemy in the limo home and making a fool out of myself - I def needed more drinks apparently. While in this bar I proceeded to walk up to a stranger …at a table…I repeat a stranger…with coworkers looking on and pull his hood over his head. I'm sorry what is wrong with me?! All I could think about was that part in Austin Powers where they're on Jerry Springer and Dr. Evil runs around the stage yelling "I got your hood. I got your hood.".  I thought I was simply hilarious. Thankfully his friends did too - no harm no foul?! What is my life??

Sunday was a total wash - I literally didn't get off the couch/leave my apartment. It was simply glorious. Sometimes you just really need days like that. I also was able to watch all things Beyonce and my love for her has grown even more than I thought it would. I saw her new documentary and her interview with Oprah. I mean - I just love her.

She's so real and awesome and beautiful and and and! I could go on. And don’t get me started on Blue Ivy - I mean could she be more precious/is a carbon copy of Jay-Z.

Yesterday was also a great day - I got to go see my bestie and her 2 little ones. They're so adorbz - I just love them to pieces! We had a great time playing and catching up!

And now I'm here - back at work - going to the gym after work - all things gross. Annnd people are driving me bananas. 

Buuuut silver lining - it's Tuesday, which means it's almost Wednesday, which means we're half way through!!

Working for the Weekend

Ugh - so here we are again.  Monday.  You are my Everest. 

 I hope you all enjoyed your weekends.  I managed to squeeze some fun out of mine!  Friday was another ridiculous co-worker extravaganza.  Once again I found myself out until 2:30 am with some work peeps.   So that happened.  I don’t even know - so ridiculous.  Saturday I wasn't as bad as last week, but managed to be a complete POS until about 1 pm when I actually decided to get off my couch and embrace the day!

I had a day of "me" on Saturday.  Honestly - I think it's so important and every girl should have one, at least every few months.  I knew I was having my lil bday swaray (by swaray I mean I told friends to meet me the Rusty Knot on Saturday night), so I wanted to get myself dolled up and ready to go.  my first stop was Denim Habit on the UES.  I know I've discussed this place before, but I'm so obsessed.  I literally stood in the doorway pathetic and said "dress me".  Well challenge accepted - I walked out with a bagful of new clothes!  Including an outfit for the night and a new pair of jeans that I'm obsessed with.  This never happens.  Jeans shopping for me is up there with bathing suite shopping - actually I might even think its worse. But these girls know their shiz…they nailed the style and size in the first shot!  Here's what I got…

Henry & Belle's Super Skinny Ankle

Luxe Junkie camis - UNREAL

Zoa shirt - you can see the look better with the pic below - but i got this color

After that I went to Benefit to get some new makeup.  They proceeded to just do my makeup.  The girl was really sweet - a lil bit of a flake/wing nut.  For example when she started doing my eye make up she got pretty far along and then freaked out, wiped it all off and started over.  She was a treat!  But I got a few new things that I really enjoyed using this morning…

Amazing eye primer

Pore-fessional - it's great to put under moisturizer

Amazing concealer - Boi-ing

My last stop was a blow out.  I'd never been to one of those places before - so it was really fun.  I went to Fix Beauty Bar (Vicky did my hair).  It was so nice to just sit back and let them do it for me, but also not have it look "done".  I also had a manicure while I was getting my hair done which was amazing - time saver and you just felt pampered!

I then took myself home and got dressed to go out.  we had dinner at Frankie 570 which was delish, not too $$, but great food/drinks.  Then we proceeded to Rusty Knot and Automatic Slims for a lil dancing action.

Sunday I did my closet - worst task ever!  I hate changing summer/winter stuff.  It's such a process and I dread it every season!  That is one thing I can't even wait to have - a closet big enough that I don’t have to partake in the ritual every season!  I finished my weekend with a fab TV line up of…Big Rich Texas, Revenge & RHONJ Reunion.  Umm can we discuss the reunion - did not disappoint.  Love it - and some people are still continuing to just bring on the cray-zay!

Wedding Bells Rang!!

Hey world, I'm back.  Sooo there has been a lot going on - like mayjah things peeps!  Most importantly, my lil bro just tied the knot!!  This past weekend was a whirlwind of fun and emotions and coupled with the insanity I like to call work, things have been pretty cray.

So the wedding was gorg - despite the torrential downpours that happened.  It was raining sideways.  NBD. Here's a few highlights because to spell it all out would take like about 20 years…

- I drove up to Boston with my brother, SIL and 3 year old nephew.  Sat in the back seat.  We pretty much had the best time ever.  My nephew and I sat back there and chilled/chatted.  It was great bonding time.   Shared some snacks, NBD.  Don’t worry I pretty much had a bag of Goldfish with me the entire weekend and he actually said these words to the flower girls "are you guys hungry??  My aunt will give you Goldfish if you want them - she ALWAYS has them."  Sooo if you ever need them - you know who to turn to!

- I got a spray tan from Benefit which was amaahhhhzing.  Everyone complimented it and said it looked soooo natch. 

- We saw David Spade at dinner Thursday night.

- I saw my sister's wedding gown and picked out my bridesmaid dress!!

- As we pulled up to the church for the rehearsal a homeless man was peeing on the lawn.  Sooo that happened.

- My sibs & I made a slideshow that pretty much rocked the entire rehearsal dinner.  Just saying.

- We got our hair done and I was obsessed with my stylist.  We pretty much laughed the entire time.  including when I said I wanted a messy low bun and he said "honey I don’t do that.  let's not say 'messy'".  Ummm pretty much that's my "go-to style", but whatevs you can do whatever you'd like.  And I wound up with a low bun with "detailing".

- I had my first air-brush makeup job and it did not disappoint.

- My nephew wore a 3 piece seersucker suit.  Nuff said.

- My newest SIL looked like a doll.  She was amazingly gorgeous.  My brother looked so handsome and they were 2 of the happiest bride & groom I've ever seen in my life!

- Richard Simmons was staying at our hotel - the one where the reception was, too - there may have been pics taken by my relatives.  And there were a lot of sparkles.

- My brother's best man speech made me cry - like a small child.  It was so heartfelt and awesome.

- We pretty much rocked our faces off on the dance floor.  I may or may not have had a dance off with my brother's friend.  It was amazing and one of the best things I've ever been involved in - in my entire life.  He was quite the worthy opponent and at the end - we just joined forces and gave everyone the show they came out to see. 

- I heart my brother's friends.  Even though one of them referred to me as "medium-old".

- Sunday came wayyyy too quickly.  I can't believe it's all over!  Wahhhh!

This weekend is one Ms. Coco's baybay shower!!!  I'm sooo excited to see the girls, I'm in a bit of a withdrawl state!!  I'll have more to report in the  next few days!!  XOXO

Nothing Wrong With A Lil Tim Riggins

Ugh!  I hate that the weekend is already over…and here we are again!  I did have a great weekend though. Got a lot done!!

I went to CT on Saturday.  It was so great - my bestie and I grabbed lunch & pedicures.  OHH I forgot to mention that first we took her son to a puppet show.  Seriously - I think I had nightmares - but the kids seemed to love it!  I stayed up there until late Saturday night and then headed back to the city.  Sunday my parents came in, we were all over the place!  It was really nice and then we grabbed dinner and I headed home to what would be the demise (we'll discuss later) of my evening/majority of Monday.  Monday I ran around again, cleaned up the apt, did laundry, did a few errands.  I also saw The Descendants by myself.  

I loved it - it was amazing.  Sad - but so well done and just a really good movie.  I also forgot how much I don’t mind movies by myself.  It's one of those things that I really just don’t mind at all and a lot of women have said to me like "omg how could you do that - so pathetic".  Well first of all - f you.  Second of all - welcome to 2012 - I'm an independent woman (aka Destiny's Child).  Third of all it is one of those things that you can do alone (not that I don’t do most things alone), that it really doesn't matter.  It's dark, you can't talk anyway, so it's really not a big deal.  And then I was back home for an evening of my latest addiction.

Y'all I'm hooked on Friday Night Lights.  

Back when it first started I watched it pretty religiously - it was on Friday nights, but at that time in my life, I was home most Friday nights, so it wasn't a big deal.  But then things changed and I only was able to watch it sporadically.  So I came across it on Netflix (I just got the "streaming" package and hooked my laptop to my TV).  Umm I can't stop.  I stayed up till like 2 am on Sunday night watching - like I could.not.stop.  I went through a season and a half over the weekend and I can't stop thinking about how excited I am to get home and watch AT LEAST one more episode.  Seriously - Tim Riggins -

be still my heart.  You are such a misunderstood bad boy and I love every ounce of you.  And Matt Saracen.  

Like I wanna scoop him up - totally heart.  I mean even Coach Taylor gets to me!  

Every character I like for different reasons and even the ones I don’t "like" - I like just because they make you not like them so well!  I'm not kidding - if you haven't watched this series already - get your butts out there and start watching! It's just that good!  At the rate I'm going - I'm hoping to be done with the series by Sunday…and then I'll be in mourning because it's all over.  Wahh.

Play By Play - "Would You Be Embarrassed If I Wore My Wings Out?!"

Y'all - things are about to get rull.  This weekend I'm heading back to the fabulous Dirty Jerz and bee-lining straight to my favorite place and yours…ATLANTIC CITY!!  It's actually far from my favorite place - but it does hold a very special place in my heart. 

Me, Sydney, CCK, Bessi, and 2 of CCK's besties are taking AC by storm!!  It's gonna be slightly out of control - as only we can get.  I'm totally psyched.  I can't wait to share with you all on Monday!! 

And now - this is a little something new - I'm going to give you the Jersey Shore play by play - these are my reactions as I'm watching the show…

- Danny's "meeting" with all the roommates.  So serious.  No one knows where Situation is - Danny calls him "useless".  Amaze.  Things need to really happen at the t-shirt shop - seriously.

- Situation crying a river. He's so sensitive - so ridiculous - over it.

- Meatballs are banged it out at the Shore Store.  Their reward - obviously a fake tattoo.

- Snooki needing to learn how to "walk hard".  The practicing = priceless.

- The pimp interview.  I mean I don't think I need to really say more.

- I heart that JWoww tore down the "help wanted" sign.  And btw - when did Danny said that by putting up a "help wanted" sign = new roommate?!

-  Umm the bunny heads - ooc.

- THE SURPRISE PARTY.  The fact that they were handcuffed to wheelchairs - I mean who thinks of these things?!    And Situation loves his stripper & takes her home.  Obviously.

- The confessional room with Deena & Ronnie - both crying.  Could. not. be. more dramatic.

- When they put the bunny costumes one - I die.  I literally peed my pants when they scared Jenni - Cyrussly - amazing.

- Couples night at the clerb - sans Snooki because she's too busy smooshing.  Sam's fight is ludicrous - like what the f even happened?!  And it was her new weave?!   I'm still confused - it was all so quick and the girls were being pulled upside-down?!  Cray!

- "I'm just trying to - ya know - do sex and this freaking clock keeps going off!" - Deena - put so eloquently as Deena can say things.

- Best part of the the whole episode - Vinny's kidnapping. I just truly heart Pauly D's and his bromance.  And that they're all doing the sign of the cross - dying.  And Deena trying to be serious in those wings.   And that tat - not one person understood.  I mean - I get it - but I just love how no one understood.  And now...whole crew back together!

And that about wraps it up!!  Enjoy your weekends!!  Be safe and think of me winning millions at the roulette table!

Straight Up 'Illin

Ugh - Monday has reared it's ugly head yet again!  I'm so over it!!!  If we could just have 3-4 day weekends every week, I'd be most appreciative.  Thanks!

Friday night was a bit of a bust.  However I did get some new make up at Bobbi Brown before the "event", so that made up for it.  I got these products and I'm already obsessed!

Party Eye Pallete

Nude Peach Blush

I mean it was fine, but everyone there was a fetus.  Like they were still in college (all the guys anyways) and it was just odd.  There were only about 30 people that came, the oldest guy (graduate) was class of '07…so I mean not like he was THAT young, but there was also just one of those.  I mean 2 guys got carded at the open bar and turned down - it was THAT kinda crowd.  Also I had to pay $50 for it - which I'm totally fine with - and it was from 6-9 pm.  So I thought that was reasonable. However, they only had like 3 different kinds of passed apps - all of which were like the frozen ones you get at the grocery store and none of which were good.  And they ran out so quickly that they only came around maybe once.  So I had a few glasses of wine and 2 apps for $50 - and that, my friends, is not ok.  Anyway - I'm glad I went - push myself out of that box!

Saturday I woke up to SNOW!!  I love the snow.  Not like blizzard insane can't go anywhere, but just fun snow.  And now that I live in a place that I don’t have to shovel or drive anywhere, I enjoy it even more - especially on the weekends when I don’t even have to leave my apt if I don’t want to!  So I did a few things around the house before our big departure to Stamford.  I knew this was going to be an interesting trip the second we left our apartments.  We got to Grand Central and walked into a squash tournament going on - yes - in Grand Central - what?!  It was the most bizarre thing.  There was like a huge glass box and all these bleachers like outside the tracks.  

I swear - only in New York!  And then as we were making our way through to get our tickets, there were like 3 weddings having their pictures taken.  That I'd never seen before either - but I do heard GC, so I thought it was cute.  We found our train and the ride up was pretty uneventful.  We were able to catch up a bit and it was actually pretty quick!  And then we pulled into Stamford.  When we got out of the train, we were all looking around like idiots and couldn't figure anything out.  At one point, Giuliana said "how is that we're all world travelers and have negotiated foreign cities/countries, but Stamford, CT is throwing us all through a loop?!"  It was stupid.  We got a cab, finally, and went to the hotel.  We were all starving so we pretty much just got changed/ready for the night and went out.

We had dinner at Lola's - which was amazing.  If you're ever in Stamford - you should def check it out!  I had 3 different tacos - sooo good.  And the margs were on point!  After dinner we headed out for the night.  Our first stop was this place called Black Bear.  We got a table and settled in for a night of amazing people watching.  The first ones we spotted was this group of guys that were a little "thugged out" but awesome.  We coined them "the original Contraband" - due to our current obsession with that movie.  One of them had a gold chain with both a cross & a Satan medallion - obviously this was Giuliana's favorite group member. They had flat brimmed hats on - my favorite had a red Nationals one (homage to my old stomping grounds).  They were like old school Marky Mark - quite possibly his "funky bunch".  Then the DJ came in - again - amazing.  He took this gig so seriously - I should also note that it was like a tiny pub type atmosphere.  With him this group of (what we thought were college students) came roaring in.  They were so ready to tie one on.  Like ridic.  Apparently they won some free happy hour and it was all you could drink.  The group leader was none other than this kid, we called "Mellow Yellow".  He had flaming red hair, acted like a moron, was loud, and was wearing a light yellow mock turtleneck sweater (half zip). 

We were just sitting there minding our business, having a good time and listening to the DJ when things started to happen.  First this guy (in Mellow Yellow's entourage) approached Carrie and started chatting her up.  With that this other guy comes at me wearing - God knows what and this most awful NY Rangers scarf.  But he didn't even have it tied and it was so gross.  You all know how I feel about guys wearing jerseys, this is now a close second.  And he was obnoxious to boot!  However, he was persistent and WOULD NOT leave me alone!  I was not entertaining him in the least bit, but he kept coming back for more.  In the middle of Giuliana making fun of me, Mellow Yellow comes flying across the room and gets in between her and the guy talking to Carrie, puts his arms around both of them and proceeds to try to speak.  This resulted in him spitting all over Giuliana - it was such a scene. Then I kept telling her to zip his mock turtle up, to which she obliged and got it up little by little.  I was dying.  Then she kept calling him Mellow Yellow and this was their exchange:

Mellow Yellow:  Are you calling me that because I like to get high??
Giuliana:  No - I didn't even know that, nor do I care too.  I'm calling you that because you're wearing a pale yellow mock turtleneck sweater and it's ridiculous.
Mellow Yellow:  Oh.  Well do you guys wanna come back to my apartment and smoke some weed?
Giuliana:  I think we're gonna pass.

So we took a shot - Skier on Acid - Giuliana's choice and headed out to the next bar.  The next one was kinda slow - not much going on.  We stayed for a little bit and called it quits.  That's when the most amazing part of our night was about to begin.  We walked over to this place, Butterfield 8.  We should have known we were in for it when we were walking in as 2 people were getting kicked out. one guy was starting a fight and this girl's hair extensions were on the threshold of the door.  Like we had to step over them to get in.  All signs pointed to amazing.  We got in and headed back to the dance floor.  At first there was only Salsa music playing.  We tried to get into it, but just weren't feeling it.  So we decided that maybe we should just call it a night.  We put our coats on and began to head towards the door.  Then all at once, 3 thigns happened (in unison):

1.  I saw the red flat brimmed Nationals hat (worn by one of the members in the Original Contraband) on a table off to the side.
2.  They DJ started playing Rihanna.
3.  The leader of the Original Contraband emerged.

Giuliana looked at me and Carrie - none of us spoke - we just immediately took our coats back and started dancing.  Our night had come full circle.  The music was awesome and we danced like fools. 

Soooo much fun!  We stayed there till closing, briefly checked out one more bar and then headed back to the hotel.  We decided Dominos was a necessity and ordered it immediately.  Of course we waited over an hour, decided it wasn't coming and went to bed.  Next thing we know - phone is ringing and Dominos is at our door.  We all thought we had been sleeping for a good hour, but in actuality it had only been 10 minutes.  I kept yelling that I was already in REM.  So we each had a piece and went back to bed.  Carrie was so confused and kept saying "Is this really happening or am I in a dream?? Why am I eating Dominos in Stamford right now?!"

The next morning we had breakfast and headed back to the city.  Although we all came back WITHOUT rings on our fingers - it was a great little get away!  We had so much fun and the trip was totally worth it!  BTW I kept saying that the night was "straight up 'illin" and the girls were having none of it.  However - I believe it's making a comeback - so basically I'm cutting edge.

My weekend was completed with a Giants win (despite being a Jets fan - I'm pulling for the GMEN!!) It's gonna be a fab Superbowl!  I always love a good Boston/New York show down!!  AND I do love me some Eli - those Mannings are just my faves!  Let's go Giants!!!