Trifecta

Whoa - seriously peeps - we have a LOT to cover. Let me break this down for you - Earthquake, white pants, Teen Mom. So without further adieu - let me begin.

EARTHQUAKE
For those of you who haven't heard - or have been living under a rock - an earthquake shook (no pun intended) the East Coast. Started in my old stomping grounds - DC and shimmied it's way all the way up to New England. My friends in DC were all fine - a little disheveled - some evacuations and it scurred the B-Jesus out of them - but they are OK.

I was on the 35th floor of a building - exactly where I'd like to be when a natural disaster strikes. I started to feel really dizzy - that's about the extent of it. I couldn't explain why - but I felt not right. Some of the other rooms had things shaking - I just felt weird. So I'm not gonna pretend it was all hella cray cray up here - but still - it was weird. People in these parts are not accustomed to that type of thing. Which is WHY its seriously pissing me off that others keep downplaying our earthquake. No - by no means was it bad - BUT it still happened and it can be scary. So stand back and let us be a little "shaken" (again - no pun intended). Obviously in places like DC & NYC when things start to shake - from our prior experience - it usually means something pretty serious. So a lot of those emotions were played out when this all happened. In the (semi) words of Sammi Sweetheart - Just let us do us.

WHITE PANTS
Moving on to the next natural disaster that is coming our way (again not as bad as it will be in the south) - IRENE. Now I don’t think the rain today is from Irene - yet - but it's pouring like a mofo out there.

Oh wait - I wasn't caught in a musical and having all funsies.  I had the bright idea to wear white pants. To my defense - I had no idea we were getting rain today - and it was gorgeous out this morning. I had to run an errand at lunch and got stuck in a torrential downpour. Let me break this down for you - me in white pants that are kinda a lil snug + monsoon = a lunatic wearing see-threw pants that are suctioned onto her legs. I'm so embarrassed. I was trying to run back into my office without anyone noticing and of course my secretary picks that moment to have a convo with me - not the time - just not the time! So I finally scurried away and closed my door - only to realize I had to go to the bathroom. So I quickly slow jogged there - did my thang - and slow jogged back. Now I'm just trying to dry off - so gross. I hate wet pants - worst!

TEEN MOM
Ok seriously - the other night was OOC. Let me break it down by girl:

Maci: Get your head out of your butt!! Are you seriously talking about having another baby with kyyyal?!

You can't even finish school with just one child! Gurl - you need to pull it together - get a degree and get a job! How do you think you're gonna pay for 2 kids?! And lets not even start on the fact that you're not even legal to drink yet! Stop being ridiculous!

Catelyn: God love these two. They try so hard and their parents always seem to take them 8 steps back.

They got Carly all these presents which they probably can't afford and want her to come to their graduation. Then Tyler's mom goes and calls Brandon & Teresa - scares them silly - and now things are potentially ruined. Now - out of ALL their parents - Tyler's mom seems to have her head on straight and it trying to "do good". She just wasn't thinking - then gets all upset and concerned that she ruined everything. Once again - Tyler & Catelyn morph into the parental figures and calm her down. Again - I actually don’t mind his mom - but seriously - use your brain!

Farrah: Whoa - she really needs to stop with the attitude. I've kind of had it with her. She suddenly decides she needs to move ASAP and leave her whole support system to chase her dream out in California. She snaps at Michael & her mom numerous times and just consistently acts like a spoiled brat. She leaves the baby - again -

and heads to CA only to find that she hates it. Upon returning she declares that she is still moving and no one can stop her. I'm anxious to see how she does all this on her own when she could barely pay her own bills a few months ago and had to take out a loan for a boob job.

Amber: Oh Amber - you continue to show your white trash ways. She finally is able to "get the house together" - why it took so long I have no idea - she doesn't work and doesn't go to school - what do you do all day?! She brings that poor little child into her house only to pawn her off a few hours later so she can go on a date.

Even though her child didn't want her to go - she declared that she still needed to do these things and keep bringing a string of strange men into her child's life. This date was really special. We come to find out that "Clinton" also has a child and simply stated "me and the baby's mom didn’t work out". Obviously - your next step would be to find someone else and hope for "play dates" together. Another gem of a line that I took away was when Amber said, "between that (meaning a salad) and the bread - I'm tripping". REALLY?! Why - just why!? We then go back to Geeery who pretends to care about this baby and his mom. Is anyone else concerned that his mom can't keep her glasses on her nose??? They are always slipping down and annoying me.

So there you have it. I hope you are all battening down the hatches and preparing for Irene!! It's gonna be a big one! All I can say is: COOL IT IRENE!!