Trifecta

Whoa - seriously peeps - we have a LOT to cover. Let me break this down for you - Earthquake, white pants, Teen Mom. So without further adieu - let me begin.

EARTHQUAKE
For those of you who haven't heard - or have been living under a rock - an earthquake shook (no pun intended) the East Coast. Started in my old stomping grounds - DC and shimmied it's way all the way up to New England. My friends in DC were all fine - a little disheveled - some evacuations and it scurred the B-Jesus out of them - but they are OK.

I was on the 35th floor of a building - exactly where I'd like to be when a natural disaster strikes. I started to feel really dizzy - that's about the extent of it. I couldn't explain why - but I felt not right. Some of the other rooms had things shaking - I just felt weird. So I'm not gonna pretend it was all hella cray cray up here - but still - it was weird. People in these parts are not accustomed to that type of thing. Which is WHY its seriously pissing me off that others keep downplaying our earthquake. No - by no means was it bad - BUT it still happened and it can be scary. So stand back and let us be a little "shaken" (again - no pun intended). Obviously in places like DC & NYC when things start to shake - from our prior experience - it usually means something pretty serious. So a lot of those emotions were played out when this all happened. In the (semi) words of Sammi Sweetheart - Just let us do us.

WHITE PANTS
Moving on to the next natural disaster that is coming our way (again not as bad as it will be in the south) - IRENE. Now I don’t think the rain today is from Irene - yet - but it's pouring like a mofo out there.

Oh wait - I wasn't caught in a musical and having all funsies.  I had the bright idea to wear white pants. To my defense - I had no idea we were getting rain today - and it was gorgeous out this morning. I had to run an errand at lunch and got stuck in a torrential downpour. Let me break this down for you - me in white pants that are kinda a lil snug + monsoon = a lunatic wearing see-threw pants that are suctioned onto her legs. I'm so embarrassed. I was trying to run back into my office without anyone noticing and of course my secretary picks that moment to have a convo with me - not the time - just not the time! So I finally scurried away and closed my door - only to realize I had to go to the bathroom. So I quickly slow jogged there - did my thang - and slow jogged back. Now I'm just trying to dry off - so gross. I hate wet pants - worst!

TEEN MOM
Ok seriously - the other night was OOC. Let me break it down by girl:

Maci: Get your head out of your butt!! Are you seriously talking about having another baby with kyyyal?!

You can't even finish school with just one child! Gurl - you need to pull it together - get a degree and get a job! How do you think you're gonna pay for 2 kids?! And lets not even start on the fact that you're not even legal to drink yet! Stop being ridiculous!

Catelyn: God love these two. They try so hard and their parents always seem to take them 8 steps back.

They got Carly all these presents which they probably can't afford and want her to come to their graduation. Then Tyler's mom goes and calls Brandon & Teresa - scares them silly - and now things are potentially ruined. Now - out of ALL their parents - Tyler's mom seems to have her head on straight and it trying to "do good". She just wasn't thinking - then gets all upset and concerned that she ruined everything. Once again - Tyler & Catelyn morph into the parental figures and calm her down. Again - I actually don’t mind his mom - but seriously - use your brain!

Farrah: Whoa - she really needs to stop with the attitude. I've kind of had it with her. She suddenly decides she needs to move ASAP and leave her whole support system to chase her dream out in California. She snaps at Michael & her mom numerous times and just consistently acts like a spoiled brat. She leaves the baby - again -

and heads to CA only to find that she hates it. Upon returning she declares that she is still moving and no one can stop her. I'm anxious to see how she does all this on her own when she could barely pay her own bills a few months ago and had to take out a loan for a boob job.

Amber: Oh Amber - you continue to show your white trash ways. She finally is able to "get the house together" - why it took so long I have no idea - she doesn't work and doesn't go to school - what do you do all day?! She brings that poor little child into her house only to pawn her off a few hours later so she can go on a date.

Even though her child didn't want her to go - she declared that she still needed to do these things and keep bringing a string of strange men into her child's life. This date was really special. We come to find out that "Clinton" also has a child and simply stated "me and the baby's mom didn’t work out". Obviously - your next step would be to find someone else and hope for "play dates" together. Another gem of a line that I took away was when Amber said, "between that (meaning a salad) and the bread - I'm tripping". REALLY?! Why - just why!? We then go back to Geeery who pretends to care about this baby and his mom. Is anyone else concerned that his mom can't keep her glasses on her nose??? They are always slipping down and annoying me.

So there you have it. I hope you are all battening down the hatches and preparing for Irene!! It's gonna be a big one! All I can say is: COOL IT IRENE!!

CCK's 30th Bday Surprise!!

Happy Monday! First things first - a shout out to all my little followers - you have taken me past the 10,000 mark (times you've viewed my gem of a blog) and I love each and every one of you for it!! I can't thank you enough!!

Keep reading - keep passing it along - keep giving me reasons to write this thing!!

Ok now that that's taken care of! I had the pleasure of celebrating my little pumpkin CCK's 30th birthday!! Sydney met me in Philly and we grabbed lunch at Jones - if you haven't been and live in Philly - run don't walk there. It's so good. It's on of Steven Starr's restaurants - comfort food of amazingness. After lunch and 2 cocktails we had to take the SEPTA trains out to where the party was. Now let me tell you that SEPTA trains have the best people watching - EVER. It was my first SEPTA experience and it did not disappoint. First of all there are only 2 cars - 2 cars - that is like the AirTran I take at JFK. Second - Sydney exclaimed at one point "I LOVE THIS THING" - the next day she did not share the same sentiment. But it was easy and we got to see some interesting characters. Bessie and her husband picked us up from the station and drove right to the party.

Now CCK thought she was soooo smart and totally knew what was going on - well she did know there was a party - but didn't know who would be there (expect for Bessie & her husband)! So she was totally shocked to see me and Sydney perched on the deck of her parents house yelling "SURPRISE"!!

It was great!! So fun to see her and Sydney and Bessie. We got to reminiscing of our college days and some of the fun times we have shared. It was great. A fun backyard BBQ. We even got to see some of the girls that we had met at CCK's bachelorette party - we hadn't seen them in years! Great food - great friends - and her family is great!

We wound up staying there until quite late - just hanging out, drinking and talking. Oh and did I mention there was even a DJ?! Awesome! He spun some stellar jams. Even Sydney was dancing - that's serious! Bessie's husband was then kind enough to take us back to their house and even obliged our Wawa trip! He's too nice! We got back to Bessie's - inhaled some food and called it a night! Sydney and I had to head back to Philly pretty early Sunday to catch our trains. She was basically dying - had trouble getting 12 Goldfish down - and yes she was counting! The train was pretty uneventful and everyone made it home in time to lay on their respective couches for the remainder of the day!

Ummm I can't end this post without mentioning the nuptials of Kim Kardashian.

You all should know by now that I have a slight obsession with the Kardahians - love their shows. I was so excited to see some wedding footage - but I'm not getting much! I'm going to have to wait until Friday and buy the People magazine. And obviously I can't wait until October 9th for the wedding special! She looked stunning - the makeup was gorg.  I think I like the bridesmaids dresses (from what I could see).  I will say this though - not sure I totally loved the head piece - there was just something about it that didn't work for me. But I'm dying to see it with the whole dress and I'm sure that it'll all make sense then! And I can't wait to see Mason coming down that aisle - apparently he stole the show!!  But for now I'll just wait with baited breath! Bye Dolls!

2 VERY Important Things

Hey guys! So this weekend was great - a lot of family time. it was my Mom's 60th bday - so we threw her a surprise party - totally nailed it! She was shocked and so happy - it was fabulous! Had dinner with my parents/sister on Sunday afternoon then headed back to the grind! One thing that is worth noting - this was a legit exchange I had with my parents. We were waiting for the train for me to get back into the city and it was POURING rain - like torrential. The train was coming in about 10 minutes - so I was itching to get out - knowing it would take a few minutes to situate myself - especially because there was a huge flight of stone steps I had to navigate to get to the train.


Dad: you should just wait - you have 10 minutes! Relax - you can just run up when you see the train coming. Don’t stand in the rain.
Mom: you know that's not a good idea - she needs time!
Me: yah - Dad - do you see those steps - you know I'm going to fall and kill myself if I try to run up there last minute.
Dad: oh yah - I forgot we were talking about you.

And there you have it - I am the least coordinated child and my dad forgot I'd cause bodily harm to myself and others around me if I tried to sprint up steps in the rain with bags trying to make a train. Other siblings - they'd do a stellar job and handle it with the utmost grace. Me - not so much.

Ok - so 2 things that came to my thought process when thinking of what I was going to write today. Here they are in no particular order.

1. The awkward hello you have to have with co-workers when passing them in the hall. Is this not one of the most uncomfortable things ever?!

Especially if it's a long hall - you both see each other and you have to say the hello at just the right time - otherwise it's too long before you actually pass - but you can't wait too long because then it's even more weird! The other day I noticed that I tend to do the quiet "hiii" and I wish I had audio - I'd do it for you. Then I follow it up with a closed mouth smile and glance down - don’t make too much eye contact. Some people go with the casual nod. I like some sort of verbal exchange - an acknowledgement if you will. What is your style? It's just so strange - and now that I've noticed it - I can't stop! I especially hate it when it's someone I don’t really like - then it's just plain awful! And I inevitably pass this guy that I don’t so much care for ALL the time - worst!!

2. THE JERSEY SHORE!! Why have we not discussed this yet?! 2 whole episodes have passed and a third on the way and I haven't uttered a single peep!

What is wrong with me?! Too much work has gone to my head! Ok so I'll break it down for you by person - I think that's the most effective way to handle this "Situation" - see what I did there?!

Snooki - oh my lil Snooks.

Her comments are just as assine as when they started. I actually have really liked her this season. I think she's very "even keeled" - if you can call it that. This new found love interest may be doing her some good. I feel like she hasn't gotten overly drunk - YET and she's managed to not cause any fights. Even being the voice of reason on occasion. My only concern - why does she sleep all day?! She's in ITALY - get out and explore! The other thing - this thing with the Situation is kinda gross - why did she hook up with him and why is he back to his usual ways and telling everyone?! He needs to stand back and have a lil respect for Jionni.

JWoww - ok - what the heck happened to her!? When did she morph into Skeletor??

She needs to eat a sandwich. That aside - I really do like Jenni. I think she's great. I died when she tried to pretend that her spray tan cans were "bronzer" - really?! And the fact that she brought over like 10 bottles - hilar. I really enjoy that her and Roger are still together - I kinda liked him last season and thought he might be a good match for her. So far she hasn't done anything too crazy and I think - once again - she's going to play more of a "mom" role in the house. I like it!

Vinny - he just cracks me up. His antics are priceless.

I love how all the boys came to his house and had a sleepover before they left. So far - he hasn't done anything too crazy. Him and Pauly together just kill me.

I'm waiting for him to bust out some crazy stuff - especially since he's the only one that can speak Italian.

Pauly D - now he is normally one of my faves - I totally heart him. I think he's hilar. BUT so far - the way he treats Deena - I don’t know.

I don’t NOT like him - but I feel like he needs to check himself. First off - that kiss - I nearly vomited all over.

Second - he did totally throw her under the bus with the Situation - but he did feel bad and buy her something. SOOOO we'll have to wait and see how he handles the rest of the trip. Hopefully he'll remain on my fav list!!

Deena - oh little Deena - the "blast in a glass". She's having a lot of trouble not falling down this season - it's a little ridic.

I really like her - but guuurlfriend needs to go easy on the booze I think. She's just partying a tad too much. When you can't stand/are falling over - you're about 5 drinks over your limit. She just needs to reign it in because I really like her - I think she's hilar. And her and Snooki together - I can't.

Situation - well I didn't think he could get any creepier - but then he rose to the occasion and here we are. He's the biggest creepster EVER!! Apparently sweatpants are his ensemble of choice - that gives him that extra gross factor.

Honestly - I can't stand him this season. And in the past - I always found a little something redeeming - now - not at all. He lurks around and just stirs up trouble. And of course he has already brought a girl home. So disgusting! And this whole Snooki thing is out of control - he needs to check himself.

And last but not least - Ronnie & Sammi - I put them together because really - how could I not?!

Ok - so Ronnie - really?! You need to lay off thinking you're "the man" and stop being dumb. Being fun and "Single Ron" is one thing - but being a jerk is another - don’t tell everyone how many girls you've been with since Sam. And this poor lil chickadee you have back in the states - flying her over is gonna cause some major dram - but it will make for a good Thursday night! And Sammi - GET OVER IT!!! Move on - enough is enough! She's so dramatic and that voice - "RONNNNNNNN" - ahhhhh! She needs to get past this and stop - just stop. She's stirring things up and causing unnecessary fights. The good part is that she seems to be getting along with the girls - so that's great. And hopefully her hair straightener won't blow a fuse - otherwise the tears will be aflowing! I'm anxious to see how this plays out - but seriously - these two just need to be put in separate corners.

So that's that! Dance Moms is on tonight - so glad some of you took my advice! And I'm going to see The Help - loved the book - so I'll let you know how I feel about the movie!!

Dance Moms

We're almost there - just one more day and another week down! Wahoo!! I'm excited for my impending weekend plans - I hope you are too! OMG - seriously - you don’t understand the TV programming my sister and I witnessed last night. Cray cray!


So a few weeks back we stumbled upon this little gem called "Dance Moms" on TLC. Let me tell you - it does not disappoint. It's utterly and totally ridiculous - but we can not stop watching!! Basically it's centered around this dance studio and the woman who owns it - Abby.

Let me break this down - Abby is insane. She is under this impression that she is the shiz and that her "dancers" are the best of the best and that all of them will go on to greatness. Newsflash - your studio is in Pittsburgh and no one knows about it. No one goes on to do anything because they get burnt out by the age of 8 years old. The "moms" are just as insane.  Here they are:

Abby makes all sorts of demands on their children - can I stress CHILDREN - and they go along with it - all the while fearing that Abby will kick them out and their girls will no longer be apart of such greatness.  They run around making costumes and props, gluing on crystals, anything Abby tells them to do. 

These children - they range in ages 6-13 years old - are so terrified of Abby that they have turned into little Stepford Dancers.

They do anything she says. She says we have to be here until 11 pm - they stay until 11 pm. She says don’t tell your mom if you're hurt - they don’t say a word. She tells them they're kicks aren't high enough - by God they stay there until they are bloody and tired but they leave with their kicks high enough.  Not to mention that all of them could really stand to eat a burger and fries!  These poor little pumpkins are going to have eating disorders by the time they are 10 years old - if they don't have them already!

Last night there was a "huge" Broadway agent coming into the studio to "scout" some of the girls. Everyone was all a twitter and nervous and yelling. It reminded me of "Waiting for Guffman" - if you haven't seen this movie - do yourself a favor and rent it - hilarious. Anyways - long story short only one of the girls got an "offer" and you can imagine the jealousy train that brought to town.

Seriously - this show is slightly disturbing at times. It makes me wonder how many parents are putting their kids through this hell just because they might "make it big". Most of these little girls don’t even want to dance - but they are forced to. It's all such insanity to me! I was a dancer growing up and in competitions, solo's, whole nine yards - I was kind of a big deal.

Just kidding (not really). My mom and dad took me all over the place. But I can honestly say - they NEVER forced me into doing anything - if anything I wanted more. Eventually I broke my foot and my tap dancing days were numbered. I just don’t really have much patience for parents that do these types of things to their kids - whether its sports, dance, cheer leading, whatever it may be. BUT it does make for good TV!!

Anyways - sorry for that PSA! Hope you all have fabulous weekends!

Turn That "Womp Womp" Mood Around!

Hello world! So today I'm kinda having a bit of a "womp womp" day. Nothing is "wrong", but just nothing is "right". Everything just feels a bit "off". Like I could completely break down in tears at any second.  I'm just not feeling the love today.

I'm trying to just focus on fun things. AKA a recently planned trip for Sydney & Kit to come up to NYC to "live my life" for a weekend. Things like that are getting me through this little funk.

Last night I saw The Change Up with Ryan Reynolds & Jason Bateman.

I thought it was pretty funny. Those 2 can really do no wrong by me - so I was laughing before I even got there. There were a few things I didn't "care for", but as a whole I thought it was funny and def worth seeing. I also love Leslie Mann - she is hilarious.

She just really nails that "housewife" role in every movie she does. I think her timing is impeccable and her chemistry with both Ryan & Jason was on point. I think she's genius. I also really enjoyed Olivia Wilde.

Again the chemistry was spot on and I thought she played the part very well. I'm trying not to give anything away - because I loathe when people do that - so I'm sorry for being so "cryptic".

Speaking of people who can do no wrong by me - I recently had the opportunity to see Jimmy Fallon live- doing his stand up.

And let me tell you - I basically peed my pants. He is so freaking funny I can't even stand it. He just doesn't disappoint. And it's "clean" non-offensive hilariousness. I just totally heart him and would marry him and have his children if he didn't already have a wife. I mean really - that is the ONLY thing standing in my way! He's just so adorably hysterical. Robin Williams (NBD) also happened to be sitting next to me and he shared my views on him - he laughed so loud I thought he stopped breathing for a second.  Not gonna lie - I was right there with him!

Here were a few of my fave jokes/bits (they might be more funny in person):

• He sang a song "Carwash for Peace" about a carwash he'd like to hold to raise money for peace in the Middle East and he was going to hold it across from the Wal-Mart Super Center.
• He discussed water guns these days and how ridiculous they are compared to the plastic ones we grew up with and how we used to have to fill ours up and hope that little plastic "plug" that was all chewed up didn't fall out - and obviously it only lasted like 5 squirts. Now they have these machine gun types with back up amo and back packs filled with water.
• He did his "Thank You Notes" and my favorite was: thank you man named Lloyd for spelling your name with 2 L's, because if you only spelled it with 1 - we might pronounce your name: Loyd.

He did a bunch of other funny things - basically I had tears streaming down my face and couldn't breath. I was doubled over in laughter - I totally heart him.

Ok just remembering those things seemed to shift my mood a bit. I even giggled when I was writing about Jimmy. I hope you are all enjoying your "Hump Day"! Until next time and hopefully then I won't be such a Debbie Downer!!

Things That Annoy Me - Friday Edition

Happy Friday! Hope you are all as tired and miserable as I am - is this day over yet?! I thought a fitting post today would be another edition of "Things That Annoy Me"! Just 2 for today - that's all I can really handle.

1. People that tell stories that pointless. True story - I was on the subway the other day and this was the story that I overheard a girl telling her friend.

• "Kevin had ice water on the table and I came in and drank it. And he was like 'did you drink my water?' And I was like 'yah was it yours?'. And he was like 'yah you can have it!' Omg like omg! Isn't that hilarious?!"

Ok first off - there was zero point to that story. No one cares that you drank some one's water and there was no reaction. If he flipped out or did something crazy - then yes - by all means - please retell it. But he didn't. Kevin simply said "you can have it". End of story. And second - that is so far from omg-ing and hilarious. At not one point in that story did I even giggle or smirk. Now I know I don’t know the players - but I'll tell you - I think her friend was on the same page that I was. Just don’t tell it. OR if you do - please own up at the end that it was pointless or really not that interesting - don’t play it off like it was the best story you've ever told.

 

2. People that do not say "thank you". How hard is it to utter those 2 little words when someone does something for you?! Someone holds the door - you say thank you. Someone picks something up for you - you say thank you. This isn't a hard/new concept. This morning I was walking to my elevator and got on. As I was getting on, I noticed a girl down the hall walking towards the elevators. Being nice - I held it for her - for a few seconds I might add. She simply walks on - doesn’t say a word.

Oh, I'm sorry what?! Are you serious?! I could have left your ass and you don’t even have the decency to say "thank you"!?! I was livid - who raised you?!

 

So that's it - I'm getting crankier in my old age! I hope you all have great weekends!!  XOXO

 

DCL - Hags Gone Wild - Final Installment

Ok ok I know the anticipation is at its peak! The final installment is here! This is prob the same kind of excitement that the Harry Potter movies brought in!

So I left off with Coco making her "point". As you could imagine - Sunday was no treat! Ruby crawled into bed with me and Sydney - and the lil pug puppies too! We recapped the night then began cleaning! Ruby's parents came by so it was great to see them and chat for a little bit. then we were off. Sydney and I went with Kit and Ruby & Hilary took Coco to the airport. It was about a 3 1/2 hour ride - so we were none to pleased to be leaving!

Our car made a quick detour for lunch when we got on the highway. Kit kept raving about Bob Evans - which didn't quite excite me as much as it did Sydney - she was dying to go. We walked in and there was a wait - obviously. And the man calling the names was priceless. He took his job so seriously - actually the manager from Friday night could stand to learn a thing or 2 from him. When he called each name - he said - with a little smirk - "Bob Evans would like to welcome The Nitter Family party of 2. Nitter Family party of 2". EVERY TIME. He also knew most of the people that came through so he was all lol'ing when he called them on the PA system. But he finally got to my name - couldn't pronounce it - and the hostess just came over and brought us to our table. Kit & Sydney basically excommunicated me because all I wanted to get off the menu was a chicken sandwich. I'm not big on restaurant's "home cooking" - I like my mom's but that's about it. Kit got some stroganoff and Sydney - not thinking about the fact that she was so hung over - decided it would be in her best interest to got this chicken noodle soup over mashed potatoes thing.



This is an actual picture

 Oh and 4 drinks. I told her she had an 8 item limit - including her drinks. Needless to say by the end of the meal Sydney was in the bathroom from overdoing it.

Our car ride commenced and Sydney needed to have a "bag" - things weren't going so well. It also doesn't help that the highways out there are very mountainous - not a good trip. There was a lot of heavy breathing and sighing from the back seat.

We distracted ourselves by telling Kit some tales from college and fun facts that she didn't already know. Including - not limited to - that Sydney once wound up on all fours outside a restaurant clutching bag of Doritos (1. The restaurant was about 2 miles from her apt on campus and 2. She doesn't know how she got the Doritos and 3. Her knees were a bloody mess). Ahhh good 'ol college - and there are plenty more where they came from - but that's a story for another day!

We finally made it back to DC and I got to see Sydney's new apt - which I heart. We were so tired we wanted to die. But - there were things that needed to be done - namely a Britney concert to attend! We quickly showered, rallied and picked up Ruby - who was equally as exhausted. We drove into the city and grabbed dinner. Next stop - FEMME FATALE! Our seats were pretty good and we were def among the older people - as these little tweens were running around in their belly shirts and school girl outfits. I'm such a hag - I actually turned to the girls and said, "They don’t even know! They weren't even born when that came out!!"

Nicki Minaj opened for her - here are a few pics - kinda hard to see.

She was amazing. Soooo good. Then it was kinda annoying because Brit didn't come on for another 45 minutes after Nicki - so we had time to kill. Sydney obvi needed a t-shirt and we got some soda to try to wake us up. It took every ounce of our beings to rally and enjoy the show.

Finally she came out - and let me tell you - Britney's BACK!!

She did sooo well - I'm so proud! She sang & danced - just like the old days. Totally loved it. She also did a great blend of old & new stuff. UUHHHMMAAAAZING!!

We are such hags though - we were all annoyed that the teenie boppers in front were standing - it was loud - all sorts of things were being spewed. At one point I got so excited that Womanizer was on and I turned to Ruby yelling "YES - I LOVE THIS SONG" - pretty sure she was sleeping.

Sleeping - at a Britney concert. I hit Sydney who burst our laughing. She was full on eyes closed. Amazing. It was only for about a minute - but then she didn't even know she had fallen asleep. We just can't do it like we used to!

We finally got home and fell into bed. Of course Sydney also took the opportunity to cut her thumb on her razor - blood everywhere. I think she was just jealous of my injury and wanted to have some attention. The best part was - we had to wake up at 5:15 AM!! I had a 6:25 AM train back up to NYC. By the time we got settled/sleeping we both slept for just a few hours. WORST.

Sydney drove me to the station - I got on the train. Pretty painless. I had my own seat - I mean who the heck is on a 6:25 am train going anywhere?! I finally fell asleep and was out cold when around Delaware I hear this yelling "EXCUSE ME MOVE YOUR BAG I NEED A SEAT". I literally jumped up - not even knowing what was happening. This older woman is standing above me. What is going on?! I grabbed my bag put it on the ground and closed my eyes again. She then proceeds to tell me that she wanted her own seat and there were no other seats on the whole train. I'm sorry - what?! You're trying to tell me that there are NO other seats on this whole train - when I can see 3. Really?! Why me?! We then reach Philly and I swear I think the Duggar family got on - or at least some version. Again - I was trying to sleep. The dad is yelling "find a seat kids anywhere just find a seat" like it was some life or death situation. They had about 10 kids, 20 bags. The mom gets on and throws the baby into a seat - in the car seat and leaves him there. What?! It was insane. She told the woman who was sitting next to him that he should be fine because she just fed him and changed him - he was 4 months old! I've never seen anything like it! They got off at Newark Airport - obviously with much commotion.

I eventually got back to NYC and headed right to work. called the doctor to have my toe looked at and get a tetanus shot. I went in that afternoon - let me tell you - tetanus shots - they are no joke. She told me when she was giving it that it would hurt - I got it and it was relatively pain free. I thought - no big deal. But then she explained that it’s the after affect that gets you. Let me break it down - I have a huge red welt on my arm, its burning hot, I cant put my arm above my head and its constant pain. But in other news - my toe isn't infected and Coco did a superb job as my triage nurse!

AND SCENE! HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE SHOW! XOXO

DCL - Hags Gone Wild - Part Deux

Annnnd we're back! Hello friends! Ok - now for the 2nd installment of the weekend - I honestly think I might have to break this into 3 - so this will most likely not be the last!

So where were we - ahhh yes the end of Friday night. Saturday morning - again - Ruby & I woke up before the rest of the group. We had our coffee and breakfast and waited. When everyone woke up we decided to take a run to the grocery store to get our rations for the evening. We planned a Mexican Fiesta - obviously. This included tacos, sangria, guacamole, Mexican dip and obvi Corona's. We got that all situated, unpacked & organized and then got ready for the Honi Honi.

Now a little info on the Honi - its in the words of Coco "the best bar I've ever been to". It's simply amazing. Not only are the drinks cheap, the live music pumping, but the people watching is out of this world. Here are few images of the Honi so you can get it in your head.

Its simply amazing. So needless to say we heart the Honi. We got there, got our drinks and headed to the lawn. It was pretty crowded, but we found a great spot. It was so nice to just relax on the grass, listen to the music and talk with the girls. One of the best parts, as I mentioned, is the people watching. While we came across quite a few "gems", including the girl that was doing the "naughty" photo shoot in her string bikini on this elephant:

This little old woman was my favorite. We all decided that this is exactly where we are headed. Please note the crocheted American flag/ Natty Light hat & the American Flag fanny pack (not pictured) - Amazeballs.

The only down side of the Honi is that children are allowed and they are abundant. I don’t think it's something that I'd do - bring my child to a bar - but who am I to judge?! For the most part they are fine and they stay with their families, however, we were among the exception. This pack of hoodlums insisted on playing FOOTBALL right by where we were sitting.

The hit me once and nailed Coco in the chest with the ball. You can imagine my rage - they just would not disperse! Our hagisms came out in full force. Here were a few of the comments:

"Scram kid" - Sydney
"Just not acceptable behavior" - Ruby
"I’m going to apply my sun block right in the middle of their game" - Kit (as she gets up and literally applies her sun block right in the middle of their game)

Soon after this we decided to pack it in. We went back to the house and out for a little evening cruise around the lake. It was such a gorg night and we were having so much fun. Kit broke out in her latest dance moves on the boat - obvi to a little Pink "Raise Your Glass". After awhile out there - we decided to dock the boat and get ready for the night. We did all our prepping for the fiesta. Basically we were all so tired and scared we wouldn't be able to rally. But around 9:30 pm - things started to get crazy. We played a few games and then Ruby's nephew came to be our chauffer for the night. It was great - he's 18 we each paid him $20 and he drove us to/from the bar. Amazing! And he loved every (most/maybe none) bit of it.

The bar of choice was The Black Bear - obviously. Let me tell you about my favorite part of The Black Bear.

As you walk in - there are 2 separate "rooms" - one to your left and one to your right. To the right the sign says "Tavern" and to the left this is what you see…

It's pretty much my favorite part of Deep Creek - it’s the clerb of the lake. Awesome. As we were entering the guy checking our IDs told us there was a cover charge - I'm sorry what?! We're at the DCL clerb - I don’t even pay cover in NYC! So Kit being the sweet talker she is got us a 2 for 1 deal and in we went! We started off in the "Tavern". As we were walking in - in the first 10 minutes - things started to get cray cray. As we walked past a tbale this guy kept yelling "Bachelorette party!!" Oh and I should also mention the place was basically empty. So said - "no, no bach party - just girls weekend" - half smiles trying to be polite. He just kept yelling "Bachelorette Party!!!" WTF?! Then we go to find a table and this older, extremely intoxicated woman came up to Kit and literally says this: "YOU ARE SOOOOO TALL!! Can I join your groups??" But completely serious. Kit basically was trying to be nice and oblige - the woman was so drunk - it was hilarious. She just wanted to be in our "group" - but finally after much coercion she went back to her "group". I mean I don’t blame her - we're fun!

We were all sitting at our little table just taking in the sights. Then some guy came up to Kit and asked her if he could use her chair - this was their exchange:

Guy: Can I take your chair?
Kit: Umm well I umm
Guy: Just give me your chair.
Kit: I'm kinda sitting on it and there are about 10 others in the room.
Guy: Just kidding - hi I'm Joe

Wait - what just happened?! His best pick up line was trying to get her to give him his chair?! Hilar. This was the beginning of the end with this group of guys. They planted themselves at the table beside ours. When a few of our friends got up to go to the bathroom - they slowly pushed their table into ours - to join our "group" - everyone wanted a piece! I of course - never one to hide my emotions - apparently gave quite the face.

Pretty sure they called me out on it too. But if nothing else - I admire their persistence. They were pretty nice guys - albeit children - but they were nice. The oldest I think was 24. One of them just wouldn't stop talking. He was showing us his "I Heart Boobies" bracelet - which he claims was for breast cancer awareness - I was still not loving that. And then things got even weirder. He told us about an incident that occurred earlier in the day. Apparently this guy's brother was getting married so this was his bach party. Well these guys thought it would be a good idea to beat each other with a wiffle ball bat as part of the bach extravaganza. I mean some guys get strippers - these guys get wiffle ball bats. He then proceeds to tell us that his butt was so sore and it had a huge welt. I mean that was TMI as far as I was concerned - but no - oh no - he then gets up - undoes his belt - and pulls down his pants so we can see it. In the middle of the bar. I didn't even know what to do with myself. Awkward Annie does not even cut it! Totally ridiculous. After this incident - we were pretty much ready to head to the "Nite Club" side of the bar.

Upon getting in there we noticed a few guys dancing and a band. Now the band was like old school mo-town. They were good - but I mean when I'm in a Clerb I don’t necessarily wanna hear "In the Air Tonight" by Phil Collins - womp womp! But we made do. So we walk in start dancing - again there maybe 15 people in here. This one guy comes up to me and asks me to dance. I had noticed his skills - or lack there of.

But he was really cute and so I thought what the hell. We start dancing and then I quickly realize that not only is he drunk - but he was on God knows what. My guess/conviction is that he was coked out. he couldn't stop moving. I was being flailed all over the dance floor! It was crazy. I mean only I would find the coked out guy at The Black Bear. I finally got away. Kit was dying laughing - it was ridiculous. Then there was another guy from his group that latched onto Ruby. He was the biggest creepster. Def drunk and just a mess. He even tried to dictate how Kit was dancing - and let me tell you - she does not need lessons! Then there was drama - apparently Coked Out Charlie was telling our new friends from the Tavern that we weren't "attractive" - which then sent them into a tailspin of fury. I still don’t know what went down - but it was drama central. After that every time Charlie came over to me Ruby shooed him away and told him to stand back. This turned into ridiculousness because then it was like the "forbidden fruit" - he didn't care about me - but knew Ruby would be mad. He was married and coked out - I really had no interest. I then took myself outside to sit with Sydney and Hilary. They had found some more new friends. Shortly after it was time for us to go home. Our new friends wanted us to come back to their cabin to hang out - we put the cabash on that and headed home - prob the best decision we have ever made.

We got home and continued our little party. Obvi made food and had a few more drinks. At this point Coco was in fabulous shape and this was part of our intense conversation about cell phones being the latest things to cause cancer - just like cigarettes were for our parents generation. Obviously a nice light hearted topic that all of us were in prime shape to be discussing. Here is a snipet:

Coco: I would like to make a point!

Me: Sure - go ahead.

Coco: My point is. What I'd like my point to be. I'd like to make a point. This is my point. (looks at me) What is my point?!

That was pretty much the end of the evening! Game over! We'll resume tomorrow for the final installment of Hags Gone Wild in DCL!