Tuesday, March 15, 2011


We had a friend’s bach party down at Long Beach Island, NJ.  When I found out the location I was psyched.  I had been going to LBI for years (since I was little) and I couldn’t wait to go back to my old stomping grounds with all the girls!  I was a little skeptical, however, when I heard we were staying at this place called Lorry’s.  I had never heard of it, which was really weird because I knew pretty much everywhere on the island – red flag #1.  The weekend we were about to embark on was more than I could have ever imagined. 

Most of the girls started the weekend early and got there Thursday night.  Ruby, Hillary & I couldn’t get out of work, so we had to meet the group Friday night.  Our ride was awful and we thought we might be in a brief horror movie when we were driving down these deserted streets with no other cars in sight and it was pitch black.  But alas, we made it!  As we pulled up, this is what we saw (only it was dark so we didn’t get the full affect until the next morning):

Please take note of the teal paint and the beautiful "deck" work.  I'd also like you all to notice the multiple flags and other paraphernalia around this spectacular motel.  

By the time we got there, the rest of the girls were raring to go.  We threw our stuff down and got ready quickly.  We had to get to The Shell!  For those of you not familiar, The Shell is this amazing beach bar – and by amazing I mean dive bar ridiculousness.  See what it looks like in the daytime below…

We get in, shot gun a few beers, totally normal – we needed to catch up.  There was an amazing cover band there that night and we were having a blast.  All of a sudden I look over to see this guy heading towards me.  It was a blast from the past – an old flame!  Sydney refers to him as Big Face, so I’ll keep with that.  Apparently he has like the biggest face people have ever seen.  He’s actually quite cute, but point taken, his face may be a bit large!  Big Face approached me and gave me a kiss/hug saying all the right things.  I had just broken up with that one douche bag, Todd, so I figured, what the hell – I’ll just go with it!  A little back story - Big Face and I had known each other for years - since we were "kids".  I would see him every summer and we'd made-out a few times in the past!  Next thing I know I’m at his beach house, in his bed, nbd.  Next morning he drove me “home”.  As we’re pulling up, he was like – “why the hell are you staying here?!”  I totally understood where he was coming from.  I as I looked around I noticed we were next door to a trailer park – yup the only one on the island.  As he was walking me to my room, I also realized the “manties” that were hanging on the clothesline.  Amazing.  I got to my room and ran inside to recap with the girls.  I crawled into bed with Ruby & Hilary and we began our discussions!  It seemed that Hilary got a lil too tipsy the night before and accidentally walked into someone else’s room and I believe got into bed before she realized that the people in there were not with us.  So she ran out screaming.  And the rest of the girls had caused a bit of a ruckus, as well.  Therefore, it made more sense when were summoned to a “meeting” with management the next evening.  After a day on the beach, we all had to sit in the “courtyard”:

And listen to this man yell at us and tell us how unruly we were and if it didn’t change he was going to call the cops and evict us.  Oh I’m sorry because by looking at this place I’m sure you have such fine upstanding clientele.  We all apologized profusely and promised we’d be good.  After all, we only had one more night, we could make it!

So we all retreated to our rooms to get ready for that night.  While I was in the shower, I realized, as did all the other girls, that it appeared to have a hole cut into shower (right under the shower head) just big enough for a camera.  Now I’m not saying they were def taping us (and all other guests), but it did seem strangely odd.  So I showered as quickly as I could – I mean I’m not even sure the soap was out of my hair.  As I reached out to grab my towel, the towels were so voluptuous!  And by voluptuous, I mean it was a hand towel that barely covered my butt - by no means am I indicating that I have a small butt - but it's not like ginorm.  And not only was it small, it was sooo rough!  Seriously it was like a washcloth made out of a Brillo pad!  So that was fun.

That night we went out and celebrated our friend’s final nights as a single lady!  We had a great time – went to another fun bar with a great band.  Had way too much to drink and grabbed late night food!  We had a blast! 

Lorry’s will forever be held near and dear to my heart.  Not only was it a great weekend with great girls, but also it gave us great memories and stories.  I mean manties, cameras in the shower, getting yelled at by “management” and a recurrence from my old flame Big Face! 

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