Tuesday, March 29, 2011


As I'm sure many of you are in my boat - I didn't always make the BEST choices in college. While I made sure I went to class, got good grades, created "networks" - some of my "social" decisions were less than stellar. Most of you were right beside me while these were taking place, sometimes cheering me on, sometimes joining in my stupidity (most of the time it was the latter). That being said - there is one particular "decision" that I'd like to discuss today. This "decision" goes by the name - Barcode.

I went to a small liberal arts college that was plagued with Ralph Lauren, Vineyard Vines, JCrew, Kate Spade and all things that are great. I melded right in, as did the majority of the campus. Of course there were a few that were "outside the box". One in particular was Barcode. Let me break this down for you…

1. He drove a motorcycle and also had a car -I believe it was Mustang
2. He more often than not was found wearing jeans and a white t-shirt - here's a visual, actually a few - he was a "cross" between these:

Minus the leather jacket of course...

By no means was Barcode as cute - but similar "bad boy" features

Again - minus the leather jacket - he had a lot of "Fonzie" characteristics
3. He was the allegedly the #1 drug dealer on campus - supplying the likes of many a "rich kid"
4. He had piercings
5. He had MULTIPLE tattoos - among them one that read something to the affect of "Death to the World", one that had the word "hell" in it, and my absolute FAVORITE one - was just simply a barcode on his neck:

Ok so now that I've painted you an image of Barcode - you can clearly see my attraction. He was like your typical "bad boy" type. Oh I should also mention that he was like 24 - when I was a junior in college - so I was 21 - and yes he was living in the dorms. He said he figured out his shiz a little later in life. Whatever floats your boat!

I first came into contact with Barcode when we were living in the same dorm. I realized that he was actually roommates with 2 of my friends then boyfriends. Jackpot! So we were hanging out in their dorm room/apartment and the 2 of us were really just hitting in off! I mean sparks were flying! So I did what any respectable girl would do - took him up to my room. Then things got a little cray cray. We just made out - nothing to redic - next thing I know - the kid takes my belt off with his teeth - oh, I'm sorry - what?! I didn’t know that was humanly possible.

It had this "clasp" - not easily "workable"!

And let me just show what kind of belt it was - not one that is easily taken off - in fact I - numerous times - had near bathroom emergencies when dealing with this belt. How the hell did this even happen?! Anyways - that sealed the deal - I was in love!

So our love affair continued and we made out when we saw each other - typical college. One day Coco said to me, "Where are you going with this? Do you honestly think you could bring that guy home to your parents?!" Point taken - my father would have a damn near heart attack and my mother would just sit there, prob in the corner rocking, wondering "where she went wrong". I did take this into consideration, but the heart wants what the heart wants. I mean I knew it was "wrong" on so many levels - but I just couldn't stop. He was my proverbial drug!

It all came to a screeching halt, however, one fateful night. We were walking home from one of the fraternity houses that we were at that night - obvi another amazing party. As he was walking me home - because he of course wanted to go back out - I mean it was only 3 am - he said the worst thing ever to me. He called me his "bitch". And not in a nice term of endearment way - I was his literal "bitch". Like I was at his beck & call and did what he said. OMG - I sobered up extremely quickly - whipped around in the middle of the field hockey field and yelled "I am NO ONE'S f'ing bitch! Do not come near me - I will walk myself home". And I did just that - I didn't even turn around. That was the last of Barcode. We of course saw each other periodically and I was cordial. He was always super nice to me and I do believe in his heart of hearts - he did not mean that at all. I'm sure he was on God knows what and it just came out. Or maybe he really did mean it and maybe in his eyes I was his "bitch" - for good or bad. Either way - my heart hurt.

I was sad for like AN second and then I found some other shenanigans to get into. Now he's just a fun story I talk about. He was my "bad boy". I never really needed another since then - I fulfilled that "requirement" on him. Which - in retrospect - is prob a good thing - I mean I got it out of the way early! Barcode is doing great things these days. He's really turned his life around. It was prob my "influence" in his life that got him back on track. He recalls the days & life with his "good girl" - and by that I mean "bitch".

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