Monday, February 28, 2011

"Hags Are Here!" (Yelled In A "Pauly D" Accent)

AC baby! The hags took over this past weekend and we had a blast! It was a successful birthday bash!! Of course it didn’t come without any fun lil stories/situations!

Sydney and I swung through the AC Airport Saturday morning to fetch Amy & Coco. We then proceeded to the hotel to get situated. As we’re walking through the hotel casino we began to see some sights! While waiting for Sydney at the elevator, some woman comes flying at me asking if I was “going up”, to which I replied, “no, just waiting for a friend”. Then she told me how she didn’t want to go in the elevator alone and kinda insinuating that I should go with her – umm what?! And so it begins! I just stared at her and then luckily Sydney came up and we were on our way. For lunch we decided that the Rainforest Café would be the best option. We began our lunch with our first drinks of the day – and in souvenir cups, too! There was also a person in a frog costume that was walking round to each table and obviously we had to get our pic with him! We had a great lunch (well kinda) followed by a VOLCANO – amazing!

They came out yelling “VOLCANO” and singing happy birthday to Sydney – she was embarrassed and hated us, but I feel like it was totally worth it! And I mean the Volcano was delish!

After lunch we headed back to the casino for a lil gambling. We situated ourselves at our very own Roulette table. It was so fun – we were having drinks and putting “it all on red”! After Sydney & Amy had lost enough money and Coco & I were up $20 a piece, we decided to head down to the bar to wait for the rest of the group. Shortly after we sat down, the rest of the hags rolled on in! Ruby, Cas, Charlotte, Hilary, & Kit – gangs all here! We had a few more drinks then headed up to get dressed for the night. I should also note that some of the people in this place were so whack-attack! Coco and I were walking past a restaurant in the hotel and saw this young boy with a “clown face” painted on him. He had a big red nose on and white make-up to look like a clown. Let me explain something to you – I freaking HATE clowns. They creep me out and I find no need in this WORLD for clowns – I absolutely hate them! So you can imagine that after a I’d already had a few drinks, seeing this “Clown Boy” really threw me through a loop!

We had dinner at Continental, which was pretty much amazing. Sooo much food, I couldn’t shovel it in fast enough! So delish – highly recommend it! We finished dinner and despite Sydney claiming she was ready for bed, I knew better, so off we went to Toga Lounge! Now first of all this is like a clerb located right within a casino – totally random. So we walk up, actually I was hobbling because my shoes were AWFUL (my friends called me Ariel because it looked like I was walking for the first time), and they tried to charge us a cover charge to get in. We all said no that wouldn’t work, so next thing we know – they waived the charge and in we all went!

It was seriously the weirdest place ever – totally bizarre. There were girls dancing on the bar – but like “professional girls” - that was their job. They weren’t strippers – but basically had nothing on and just danced – awkward. So we found a lil spot and the and of course our luck a large group of “grenades”, if you will, sat like right on top of us. I’m talking like a minefield! We finally were able to get another spot and got ourselves away from that unfortunate situation. Here are just a few things that occurred while we were in this location:

1. Some guy came up to me and asked me if I wanted to go out to the boardwalk with him and smoke pot. I replied “seriously?!?!” to which he said “yah, seriously” and then I said, “Oh, I mean if you’re serious – then……NO – get away!”. Like really?!!

2. This little foreign man would not leave Sydney alone. He was like a smitten kitten. It came to a halt when he tried to take her picture with him on his camera phone so that his co-workers would see that he talked to a girl. She yelled, “Oh, God no! I don’t do that!” And then he kinda just sulked away.

3. Ruby and I did a fantastic rendition of “Single Ladies”.  Coco & Amy thought it was just hilarious to pretend like they were taking pictures, when really they were filming the whole thing.  Def not something I need to have "surface"!

4. We all eventually got our “energy” back after dinner and busted a move to some awesome “tunes”.  It was a great "set"!

5. One of the “dancers” fell off her “box”/stage and then pretended that it was her heel of her boot that broke – but it totally didn’t she was just too focused on her “sexy dancing” to realize that she had overstepped her boundaries and down she went!

6. We saw a few very interesting characters – I mean only in AC would you see such sights!

7. A girl got kicked out because she was so bombed – and then proceed to fall as she was being escorted out – oh and she was wearing flats and there were no steps/it wasn’t dark - how she even managed to fall is beyond me!

Finally around 2:30 am we decided we needed a change of scenery, so Dusk nightclub seemed like the best idea. When we first got in the clerb the music was great, total old school rap and college throwbacks! Amazing! There were fog machines going, people dancing like lunatics and I swear the way some of those girls were grinding – someone left pregnant. I know that is the hag coming out in me – but we were all a lil shocked at the outfits and antics of these young ladies! I actually turned to Coco and one point and exclaimed, “where are their mothers?!”. Anyways – we to stay there for a lil while and Sydney was in her glory – so it was totally worth it!

By the time we got out of there it was about time for us to call it a night. It was after 4 am, my feet were basically bleeding – Ariel needed to go back “Under the Sea”. We basically just went to bed when we got home – a lil bit of recapping, but we were all exhausted from our shenanigans!

The next morning was a lil rough – I mean we can’t do it like we used to! Me, Sydney, Coco, & Amy had breakfast together. We were all al lil cranky and imagined that this would be our life as old women in our Florida old folks community! I then had to get on a Greyhound bus back to NYC, and thank God, Sydney, Coco & Amy stayed with me at the station. It was the seediest place EVER! Finally I got on and there were a slew of lunatics that were going to be with me for the next 2.5 hours. I was a lil nervous at first – there were a lot of random phone convos going on and carings on – but shortly after we started our trek, everyone went to sleep.  Amy & Coco had to sit in the AC airport all day because the only flight back was at 6pm! WORST! And poor Kit was so sick – she was such a trooper all night, but she actually was like legit sick and was just in miserable shape to have to drive all the way back to DC!!

So basically the hags infiltrated AC and conquered! I had a blast and I think Sydney left with a huge headache – which equals a good night. Obvi my memory might not have captured all our antics – so anyone that was there, please feel free to add on!

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