Spin Span Spun

So I've been trying my best to get my butt back in shape! I tend to take these lil "hiatuses" if you will - you'll actually hear more about them - I have them for various aspects of my life. Apparently I thought it was appropriate to take one for the month of December and just not work out or do any sort of physical activity - unless it involved getting to/from work, getting to/from the bar, or walking to my door from my couch to get my food delivery. So as you can imagine - things have gone a lil south in the old physique!
So back to the gym I go! Gotta get back to "date weight"! I've been really, really good and I've been going about 4-5 days a week. Plus my 2-mile walk to/from work everyday- I'm feeling good! I've also been taking a spin class every Wednesday on my lunch hour. Which does leave me a lil sweaty and gross (even though I shower at the gym), but it's totally worth it! So you can imagine how I felt when I walked in the other day - all pumped ready to spin to find not only a "substitute teacher" I can only describe her with the following…

- A short "stocky" woman - maybe about 5 foot tall
- She was about 70 years old
- She had clearly done one too many color jobs on her hair - it was a frosted/fried situation that was slicked back in a ponytail fastened with a pink SCRUNCHIE (hello 1993!)
- She was wearing hot pink leggings with a short animal print (also hot pink shirt)
- She had on make up that looked similar to mine after my "Richard" experience
- She wore a Kabbalah bracelet
- She also wore a "Madonna - type microphone" - hands free of course

So not one to "judge", I decided I'd be in for a treat and maybe this would be the best class ever - positive thinking! So I got myself set up, started to warm up and then she started the class. She herself did not spin; she just stood in front of the room. And then the music began. It was like dance/techno that was loud and ridiculous. It was as if she came straight out of Studio 54. All I was really missing were my glow sticks. Everyone in the class looked around in horror, we normally are riding along to a nice playlist of classic rock! She stood up front swaying/dancing along to the music. She only stared at her stopwatch and would randomly yell things out. I barely understood, despite her elaborate sound system she was sporting! I felt like I was being punked. Then in the middle of the class she starting telling everyone about this 4-week course she's teaching and how we should all sign up through her. Oh, I’m Sorry, What…The only thing I could think was how inappropriate to be "hocking" your business during a spin session when I'm just trying to breath and get through the 45 minutes of hell that I'm enduring! I hated every second of that class! I'll be going back for another round tomorrow - if that lunatic greets me - I'm out the door!!


**UPDATE** For all of you that were "worried" - George was back today - thank God!!